From: rioux@unixg.ubc.ca ("Scarlett Otter") Newsgroups: alt.tv.x-files.creative Subject: NEW STORY:"Blind Faith" Date: 5 Jun 1995 01:13:42 GMT Hi Bunch. Well, as promised, here is my second story "Blind Faith". You don't have to have read "Xmas..." to follow the plot, but I strongly suggest that you do. If you need a copy, email me and I will send it to you. This is another romance, so if that's not your thing, stay away. Still, there actually is an X-File behind this, so it's not pure mush. I would rate it PG 13. Comments and criticism would be truly appreciated at rioux@unixg.ubc.ca So here it is... Blind Faith by "Scarlett Otter" rioux@unixg.ubc.ca Very special thanks to Meg Katz (sorry for getting you addicted to this stuff) and Henry Lee, story editor extraordinaire!!! F.B.I. Headquarters 8:53 p.m. "Done, finally!" Agent Fox Mulder rolled his chair away from his desk and stretched his long limbs. "Paperwork is so brain numbing!" A grumble came from his partner's desk. "Tell me about it." Dana Scully mumbled. They were wrapping up a case that had been particularly hard on them. They had been to three states in five days, sleeping an average of four hours a day. The agents were in pursuit of a rapist who kidnapped his victims by inducing them into some sort of sensory overload, using powerful lights and piercing sounds. And when he was done with them, he hypnotized his victims and made them believe they had been kidnapped by aliens. Mulder and Scully had finally caught him after a nationwide game of hide and seek. But still, by that time he had attacked ten women. Not only had the trip been physically exhausting, with lots of travel, little sleep and major jet lag, but it had also taken its toll emotionally on Mulder. Cases involving UFO abductions were always sensitive for him. But as it turned out, this wasn't an alien abduction case, and that's what was eating away at the back of Mulder's head. He was starting to doubt his own memories, his long standing beliefs. Fortunately, Scully had been there to keep him sane. She was the one who pointed out that, when re-hypnotized, the victims recalled the rapes, not the stories that had been planted in their minds. Mulder's memories were genuine, unlike the victims. He had to have witnessed the events he recalled. Scully knew that Mulder not only wanted to believe, but needed to believe. And although she wasn't much of a believer herself, she wholeheartedly supported Mulder in his personal crusade. So when she saw him smile again after finishing his paperwork, she'd taken it as a good sign. "So, Agent Scully, can I interest you in drink after work?" Mulder asked in a joyful tone. "Mulder, we just spent the whole week on the road. Don't you want to go home and relax a bit?" His smile faded away. Just because he didn't have a life outside of the X-Files, didn't mean the same was true of Scully. Mulder never got tired of being with her, so it didn't occur to him that maybe she would like some breathing space. "I'm sorry, Mulder, that didn't come out right. I didn't mean..." He interrupted her. "It's okay, Scully. Don't worry about it." "I'm just jealous because you get to go home so early." Scully said in a weak attempt at humour. Mulder simply smiled. "Well, if you change your mind, give me a call." Mulder grabbed his trench coat and promptly exited the basement office. Dana Scully was mad at herself. She'd always been very careful about her personal relationship with her partners... especially with Fox Mulder. But now, their relationship had changed. When they became lovers, they had decided to go slowly, to take time to adjust to their new feelings. That's why they hadn't been intimate yet. They still took two hotel rooms when they were out of town, in an attempt to keep their personal lives and professional lives separate. However, given the nature of their work, that was not easy. They spent their days together, entrusting their lives to each other. They had become dependent on one another, and that made them one of the best pairs in the F.B.I. But for the same reasons, trying to conceal their unprofessional relationship from the rest of the Bureau proved to be quite a challenge. So, it's wasn't that she didn't want to see Mulder that evening, she just needed some space. He was so passionate about his work, so...intense that he sometimes became overwhelming. So tonight she'd let her apprehension about their budding relationship take over, and she'd neglected to look at his feelings. He wanted to go for a drink, that's all. Actually, he probably wanted to talk to her about how he had felt during the last case. She knew she was the only person to whom he'd be willing to open up. She scolded herself for not being there for him. Without even a second thought, she grabbed her coat and ran out of the office after Mulder. When Mulder got to the garage where his car had been parked for the past week, he was still trying to figure out how to kill the evening. That is why he never noticed that Scully had caught up to him, nor did he see the fine tripwire on the car's door handle until it was too late... There were days when Scully seriously thought that Mulder was made out of rubber. The fact that he had only suffered a concussion after such a powerful explosion was unbelievable. Fortunately for him, Scully was there to offer medical assistance immediately after the incident, thus limiting the physical damage. But there was nothing that she could have done about the blinding light. Mulder hadn't shielded his eyes during the explosion, so he panicked when he heard Scully's voice close to him, but couldn't see her. She rode in the ambulance with him, providing much needed support, just being with him by his side. She was pretty certain that Mulder had suffered a severe retinal burn. The question was whether it had been bad enough to inflict permanent damage. Scully feared the worst. Georgetown University Hospital 9:47 p.m. "So Doc, when are you gonna turn the lights back on?" Scully's face darkened; the doctor was shining a pen light straight into Mulder's right eye. "Mr. Mulder, you've suffered a severe flash burn. It's hard to tell if there will be permanent damage at this point. Just consider yourself lucky to only have a mild concussion." The doctor turned to Scully. "I'll go prepare the saline solution for his eyes. I'll be right back." Mulder heard the doctor leave the room. "Well, how about a second opinion, Dr. Scully?", he asked. "Mulder, I can't tell you anymore than what Dr. Webber already said. It's just to early to know." "Great. When can I get outta here?" "You have to stay overnight for observation. Not that you'll be sleeping much with that concussion..." Mulder grinned. "The one night I feel I'll sleep like a log, and they won't let me." Scully started smoothing Mulder's ruffled hair. "But if you want, I can get you released under my supervision, tomorrow." "I think I'd like that." Mulder replied. Scully smiled. "Of course, that also means that you have to do as I say!" Now, it was Mulder's turn to smile. "Dana, I am at your mercy." Scully thought it was a good thing that Mulder couldn't see how she blushed at his last comment. Just then, Dr. Webber came in with the bandages for Mulder's eyes. Scully called the office the next morning to find out if the lab technicians had come up with any leads as to who planted the bomb in Mulder's car. They told her that they were quite backlogged and they probably wouldn't get anything until late afternoon. Her next call was to Assistant Director Skinner, to explain the situation and ask for some time off so she could help Mulder get back on his feet. He gave her a few days of personal time, and asked her to keep him updated on Mulder's condition. She still didn't quite understand the radical change in her boss, but was grateful for his support. Scully hopped in her car, and headed for the hospital to get Mulder out and help him adjust to life without sight. That would not be easy, she thought. Mulder was so independent, he would find it hard to constantly rely of someone else to accomplish the simplest of tasks. In the car, on the way back from the hospital, Mulder turned to Scully. "Well, that sure didn't take long." She replied with a smirk. "You have shadowy contacts in the government, I know doctors in high places." Mulder smiled. He was very calm, which surprised Scully. She'd expected him to be much more agitated, given his new situation. She continued. "I've gotten some time off to help you settle in at my place." "I don't think so." "What?" Scully said, somewhat surprised. "I want to stay at my place." "But Mulder, your place is a mess. You'll hurt yourself." she argued. "It may be a mess, but it's a familiar mess. I don't know your apartment all that well, but I know mine like the back of my hand." He had a point, Scully thought. "All right" she said. "But if I see a pizza box start crawling on its own, I'm out of there." She paused. "Just let me go grab some things at my apartment first." Half an hour after parking in front of Scully's apartment, Mulder heard the trunk of the car slam, and Scully get in the driver's seat. "Gee, Scully are you moving in? I thought we were supposed to take it slowly?" "I just wanted to make sure I got everything, that's all." She replied. Mulder grinned. He just couldn't resist. "You could borrow my clothes. I don't mind." Scully returned the grin. "Some things I can't borrow from you, Mulder." His grin turned into a wicked smile. "You could go without..." was his suggestion. She playfully shoved her unread mail in his lap. "Hey, no fair. You're attacking a blind man here!" "Mulder, I *know* that you're mentally undressing me as we speak, so this is fair game." "Ah...the advantages of a photographic memory!" He prepared himself for another attack. "Keep it up, Mulder and I'll make you walk home." "Party pooper.", he said with a smile. Dana was glad to see him cheer up. She knew he still had a tough road ahead of him. "Mulder, it just baffles me that you can find anything in here." Scully said of the mess in his apartment. "Hey, it's just unconventionally organized." he explained. "Uh huh," Scully replied as she removed from the couch a pair of sneakers and a videotape that were wedged in-between the cushions. Mulder felt his way to the couch, and plopped down on it. "So, any leads on who the mad bomber is?" "No. The lab is back logged and they don't have much to work with." Scully's tone changed. "Don't worry about it. I'll take care of the investigation. All you have to do is rest and get better, okay?" Mulder pondered that for a second. "I'll go nuts in here." "Mulder, you won't do anybody any good by getting sicker or becoming permenently blind." Dana let out a long slow breath. Mulder's facial expression changed. Permanently blind? That couldn't be. Dana was taking care of him. She sat next to him and took his hands in hers. "Please Mulder, let me do this for once." "You really think I could stay blind?" He forced himself to ask. "It's a possibility." she said in her most compassionate voice. Mulder's hands were clasping Dana's wrists. She pulled him close. He buried his face in her chest, holding her tight. "But we don't know that yet" Dana said softly, running her fingers gently through his hair. Somewhere in Washington, D.C. 5:42 p.m. Damn, he missed him. He wasn't used to failure. He had to try again, and succeed. This time, maybe he could even get her too. His approach would be different. He would be get close, very close...and go in for the kill. Then he would have the flame haired agent for himself. He got quite excited just thinking about it. Not far from there, he heard a fire alarm go off. Mulder heard Scully hang up the phone in the kitchen. She had been in there for over an hour, and whatever she had been preparing now smelled fantastic. She came back into the living room. "The lab didn't find much. There was very little trace evidence left. Seems like anything significant would have been destroyed in the fire. Agent Morrisson said he had a couple of tests he wanted to try, but the results won't be in 'till morning. I'll go and see him after my meeting with Skinner." Dana explained. "What does Skinner want now?" Mulder asked, a bit worried. "I don't know. He's probably curious to find out how you're doing." "He doesn't need to summon you to find out." Mulder pointed out. "I'll call you right after the meeting to let you know, okay? Now how about some dinner. I'm starving." Mulder felt Scully tug at his arm, and he let her help him off the couch. He inhaled deeply. "Wow, she can cook too!" Mulder told Scully with a smirk. "I found the recipe on 'Secret of America's Best Cooks'." "I knew someone would get around to using that tape." They arrived in the kitchen, and Dana led him to a chair near the table. She then set a plate full of chicken and mashed potatoes in front of him, and put the utensils in his hands. A look of resignation registered on his face. He hated being useless like this; unable to accomplish the most simple tasks without Scully's intervention. He didn't know how much longer he could keep it together. He silently started to eat. He tried to visualize the plate to avoid making a mess. It was a slow and painstaking process, but he muddled through. He was almost done when he felt gravy slowly dripping down his chin. But before he had a chance to wipe it off, Dana was doing it for him. He was about to snap at her when he remembered that he'd done that to her once... purely out of affection. Scully broke the silence. "You're awfully quiet, Mulder. What's the matter, you didn't like my chicken?" "No, it was great. I could really get used to this home cooking thing." Mulder stood up, carefully. "This is just so damn frustrating. I can't do anything about it...I can't do anything period." Before their discussion got too depressing, Scully decided to lighten up the mood. "Yes, I'm afraid your favorite magazines don't come in Braille versions." He smiled at her joke, and moved closer to her. He awkwardly wrapped his arms around her and whispered in her hair: "Actually, I can think of a thing or two to do that won't be affected by my blindness." Dana raised her head and kissed him gently. "That's a very tempting offer, Mulder, but you have to rest and I have to get up early tomorrow morning." She paused. "All in good time, Mulder." and then planted another kiss on his lips. He sighed. "I know. Anticipation can be a good thing." Later, when the time came for them to go to bed, Mulder insisted on taking the couch. "But you need to sleep, Mulder." Scully protested. "That's exactly why I want the couch. I'll sleep better there, trust me." "All right." Scully conceded. "But if you're still awake at 3 in the morning, I'm giving you a sleeping pill." Mulder made his way to the couch and started settling in. "I guarantee you that won't be necessary." he said with a yawn. Scully tucked him in and check his vitals one last time. Satisfied that all was in order, she kissed him goodnight before heading for the bedroom. Mulder's bedroom was much cleaner than the rest of his apartment. That made sense since he barely spent any time there. The bed was neatly made, and the rest of the room itself was somewhat tidy, except for the pile of laundry he never got around to folding. Scully took a closer look at the dresser. There were a few pictures stuck to the mirror. Pictures of him and Samantha. A picture of her taken at her graduation from the Academy. That was strange; Dana didn't recall giving him a picture of herself. Then in a pile on one corner of the desk were files and other things. Pictures of his parents, face down. His diploma from the Academy. The X-File bearing her name. A letter from Phoebe Green. Basically, a pile of things he didn't particularly seem to want to remember. As tempted as she was to read the letter from Phoebe, she resisted the urge. Whatever that woman had done to him, she had hurt him pretty badly. That's all Dana needed to know. With the strength of their new relationship, he was healing and that was all that mattered. Dana quickly undressed and folded her clothes neatly before putting them on top of her overnight bag. She slipped into bed and buried her face in a pillow. The smell of him surrounding her made Dana feel relaxed, comfortable, but also...incredibly aroused. If she wanted him so much, why did she keep denying herself the pleasure? Mulder would be there the morning after. And he would still respect her, of that she was certain. She had been afraid that things were going too fast, but then again, they had been involved since Christmas, which was some time ago. Of more immediate concern was how tired she was feeling. Heading into Skinner's office in the morining tired was not a pleasant thought. It always felt like going to the principal's office... The alarm tore Scully away from a very pleasant dream. She grumbled and rolled in the bed before the sound of the shower registered in her mind. 'What is he doing up already?' she asked herself as she saw the time on the alarm clock. She got up and headed towards the bathroom to see if Mulder needed a hand. A smile crept up her lips. She sure wouldn't mind giving him one this time... Mulder heard the soft knocks on the door. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up." he said with a still husky voice. Scully walked in. "You didn't. What are you doing up so early?" Scully looked at him. He was pointlessly standing in front of the mirror, wearing only a pair of sweat pants. She walked up behind him, and delicately put her hands on his shoulders, enjoying the exciting contact of skin on skin. She whispered seductively "I was wondering if you needed a hand..." Mulder slowly turned around to face her. "I could always use a hand, especially yours..." he purred back as he leaned in to kiss her. As soon as his lips touched hers, she melted. She always did. How did he do that? Finally, she told herself to just shut up and enjoy the feel of him in her arms. Once they finally let go of each other, Mulder picked up their interrupted conversation. "Well, I was having some technical difficulties with shaving." Scully raised her hand and felt the three days worth of stubble on his chin. "I can help you with that." As she started to smear the shaving cream on his face, Mulder softly chuckled. "Care to let me in on the joke?" Dana said. "Oh, I was just remembering the last time I let a woman shave me." What happened?" She continued. Mulder cleared his throat. "That's how, uh..." he hesitated and automatically blushed. "That's how I got in trouble the last time. But hey I'm clean now." he completed with a huge grin, and faint memories of Kirsten still on his mind. Understanding flashed across Scully's face. "Fox Mulder, if you don't wipe that stupid grin off your face right now you're gonna get in trouble with *me*." "Yes ma'am," was all he could reply. After shaving Mulder, Scully also changed his bandages. She didn't like the stains she found on the old ones. If infection had set in, it would make it even harder for a full recovery. She didn't mention anything to Mulder, though. There was nothing he could do about it, and if she didn't hurry, she'd be late for her meeting with Skinner. F.B.I. Headquarters 9:06 a.m. "That is why I feel that my only option at this point if to temporarily shut down the X-Files and re-assign you to the pathology lab at Quantico." Scully was fuming. They were doing it to them again. "But Sir, you can't shut down the X-Files just because Agent Mulder is out of commission." The anger was creeping up in her voice, but she remained in control. "If you re-assign me to research, I'll never get to the bottom of what happened to him. Please sir," Scully was practically begging. "We need the X-Files. Don't take them away from us again." Skinner sat back in his chair. At least no one could say he hadn't tried. "All right, Agent Scully, you may remain with the X-Files, but you will be assigned a new partner until Agent Mulder can resume his field agent duties." "But sir, agent Mulder is my partner." "That's the best I can do, Agent Scully. That will be all." The phone rang in Mulder's apartment. He swore quietly as his shin bumped against the living room table. He finally located the phone under a pile of magazines. 'I have to clean up in here sometime' he mumbled to himself. "Mulder." "How're you doing, Mulder?" "Just dandy, Scully," he answered, rubbing his leg. "What did Skinner want?" "To shut down the X-Files...again." The traces of anger were still apparent in her voice. "What? Son of a bitch..." "Calm down, Mulder. He didn't. But..." Scully stopped. She knew the next piece of information wouldn't go over too well. She took a deep breath. "But what, Scully?" Mulder rushed. "I've been assigned a new partner." she let out in one breath. Mulder was fuming. "A new what?!?!" "It was the only way, Mulder. Otherwise, Skinner would have buried me in Quantico and I never would have gotten to the bottom of what happened to you." "I'll tell you what happened to me! I've just been shafted by the F.B.I. again," he almost screamed, furious. "Mulder, please calm down. All of this is temporary. Skinner said so himself. As soon as you're back on active duty, you'll be reassigned to the X-Files." "So when do you meet your new partner?" Mulder emphasized the last two words, fairly dripping with sarcasm. "*You* are my partner, Mulder. Nothing can change that." she paused. "I'm meeting him in half an hour." "Any news for the lab?" Mulder asked. "That's my next stop. Look, I'll be back around dinner time. Think you can manage without me until then?" "Guess so. Unless I bore myself to death, first." "Nah. Your imagination is way too active for that." She smiled at the thought. "All right, I gotta go. See you tonight?" "Yeah, I'll see..." Mulder caught himself. "I'll talk to you tonight." Somewhere else in Washington, D.C. 2:35 p.m. His plan was ready. He found out that the agent was blinded in his last attempt. That was good...very good. Being recognized was a problem he didn't have to worry about anymore. Now, he could just show up on his doorstep, and the agent wouldn't know what hit him. He smiled at the thought. Soon, but for now, he needed to make a trip to the hardware store. F.B.I. Headquarters 3:57 p.m. Scully grabbed the reports from the lab guys in a hurry. She had spent the afternoon digging up old cases files. Somehow she had a feeling... She didn't want to be late for her meeting with her new partner. She grimaced at the words. She just had time to dump the lab reports on her desk when she heard the knock on the door. The young agent poked his head in the office. "Agent Scully?" he said, clearing his throat. "Yes." "I'm Agent Matthew Delaney. It's a pleasure to meet you." Scully couldn't help but notice the hesitation in Delaney's voice as he stated his name. 'This guy must be really green', she thought as she shook his hand. And he also looked familiar. She observed his facial features, his body language. Seeing the expression in her face, Delaney answered her unspoken question. "I took one of your seminars at Quantico..." He paused. "It was a big class." he finished. "Of course. Please come in." Scully offered, but there was nowhere for him to go. Dana quickly grabbed the chair from Mulder's desk and rolled it to the front of hers. She put a pile of files in front of Delaney's seat. "As you probably know, Agent Mulder was injured in a recent explosion. This...attack was too well calculated to have been random. I want to go through all of the cases Agent Mulder participated in and look for possible suspects. People who have an ax to grind and are familiar with explosive devices." Scully put on her glasses and grabbed her still unread mail before delving into the lab reports. Delaney grabbed the top file on the pile. Scully scanned the enveloppes quickly and found one with no return address and a Virginia postmark. She carefully opened the enveloppe. The letter was typed and unsigned. A deep blush crept up her cheeks as she read it. Mulder had outdone himself this time. She'd never pegged him as the type to send love letters... especially ones this hot. But then again, there were still a lot of things about him that she didn't know. "Agent Scully, are you all right?" Delaney asked. Scully's head snapped up "Fine. Why?" she asked a tad too quickly "You, er, look a little flushed" It took all of her self-control not to blush further. "I'm fine" she said again. "It's the coffee, it's kind of hot." Delaney glanced at the cup from which she had yet to drink and was about to comment but decided it might be a bad career move. Instead, he glanced at Mulder's cluttered desk. Obviously feeling out of place, he told Scully: "I hope Agent Mulder will be all right." Scully simply smiled, a smile that practically screamed 'Me too.', and then buried herself in the lab report. Delaney immersed himself in the case file before him, determined to help. He had heard rumors about the two of them, about the X-Files. He knew his assignment was only temporary, but every time he saw the pain in Agent Scully's eyes, he knew he had to give her his best. Much later, Scully took off her glasses and rubbed her temples. There had to be a connection somewhere. She could feel it. What she needed was someone with whom to bounce ideas. Actually, she needed Fox Mulder. This Delaney kid was nice enough, even quite a keener, but she needed Mulder. Scully looked at her watch. 6:38. She had better go; Mulder was waiting for her to come home. She started packing her things, not too sure what to do with Delaney. She barely knew him, and didn't trust him quite yet. The whole mess with Krycek made her weary of new partners... and with good reason. But Delaney got up, and as if answering her unspoken words, mentioned something about going up to the archives to do some cross-referencing. She packed some of the more recent X-Files they hadn't had time to go through yet, and escorted Delaney to the door. She pulled out one of her business cards and scribbled her cell phone number on the back. She handed it to him. "Here, I want you to call me at this number if you find anything." "Will do." Delaney answered before promptly heading for the records room. Mulder was lying on the couch, listening to music. After fumbling with the CD player for twenty minutes, he finally managed to get it going. God, he was so frustrated. It had been a loooooong day, with not much for him to do, and no way to tell time. The only distraction had been when a package was delivered for him. He wasn't sure what it was, but by the feel of it, it looked like his adult video selection of the month. When the delivery man unashamedly asked him for a light, Mulder had slammed the door in his face. It felt like the whole world wanted to remind him of his condition. He had shoved the package under a couch cushion, not daring to ask Scully to confirm the contents. He made a mental note to cancel his subscription. And speaking of Scully, shouldn't she be back already? She must have heard him because Mulder recognized the jiggling sound of keys on the lock. He smiled. He'd missed her. Scully dropped her briefcase and took off her trench coat before heading for the couch. "Keeping out of trouble, Agent Mulder?" she asked. "Depends on who you ask." was his reply. Dana sat down next to him. "Let me look at your eyes." She put a hand on his arm, but before she had the chance to do anything else, Mulder raised his other arm to put his hand behind her head. He kissed her deeply, longingly. Dana gave in and returned his show of affection with equal fervor. "Missed ya, Scully." he admitted, a bit out of breath. "That's the best 'welcome home' I've had in a long time" she answered him with a seductive smile. "And there's plenty more where that came from, you know." She blushed, yet again. How she wanted to find out. She shook the thoughts out of her head, and scolded: "Mulder, you've changed the subject again. I want to take a look at your eyes." she said in her best doctor's orders voice. She took off his bandages and noticed stains again. She frowned. Mulder's eyes were still swollen shut. As she put on new bandages, she started to explain: "We're going to see Dr. Webber tomorrow morning." Mulder didn't have to ask why; he'd heard it in the tone of her voice. "That bad, uh?" "I'm not an ophthalmologist, Mulder, but what I'm seeing isn't very good." "I don't want to stay this way, Scully." He paused. "I don't." Dana couldn't reply. All she could do was hold him tight and let him know that she would be there for him... no matter what. F.B.I. archives 7:12 p.m. Agent Delaney couldn't believe what he was reading. Nothing that he had learned at the Academy could have prepared him for cases like those. Having to go through Mulder's old case files, and finding out everything Mulder had to face brought him a whole new respect for the man. Actually, he wouldn't mind working on the X-Files himself. Sure would be better than the 'fraud squad'. Especially if he had to work with Special Agent Dana Scully. He was sure that Mulder didn't have a problem with being teamed up with her either. Delaney had seen the shift in Mulder's opinion of her through various case reports. From the "spying ice queen," to the only person in the world he wholly trusted. Delaney wondered if there was more to it than that. But that wasn't any of his business. Right now, he needed to find a connection: someone, somewhere in Mulder's past who would want to fry him up. When Scully went to the kitchen to make them something to eat, she found herself entering something that looked more like a combat zone. A chair was lying on its side. Broken dishes were scattered in the sink. Utensils strewn everywhere. "Mulder, what the Hell happened in here?" Scully asked, still in shock. Mulder carefully felt his way to the kitchen, guided by her voice. "Uhh, I got...frustrated." "Oh, very nice, Mulder. You could have injured yourself pretty seriously" she scolded. "I didn't particularly care at the time." he answered plainly. "But why..." "BECAUSE I WAS SCARED." he said too harshly. He sighed deeply. "I am blind, Scully. If I stay this way, my life as I know it is over. My career is over. I lose the X-Files, Hell, I've already lost them... And I lose *you*. I couldn't live with that..." He cupped her face in his hands, feeling her delicate features. "Never seeing you again...it's too much, Dana." Scully was at a loss. "I'm not going anywhere, Fox, you know that." "Then make love with me, Dana." he pleaded honestly. "I want to forget about the F.B.I., forget the blindness, forget Special Agents Mulder and Scully. I just want to think about Dana and Fox." He hesitated. "I know we decided to wait, but..." his voice trailed off to a whisper "...but I need you." Mulder felt the warmth of Scully's tears on his hands and brought her even closer to him. His voice was shaky. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked. We can wait..." he apologized. Dana held him tight. "This is a big step, you know." she said softly. The apprehension transpired in her voice. "I know. But I love you. And unless I'm terribly off track, I think you love me too..." Dana smiled, confirming his assumption. "...And *that* is all that matters, Dana." She loved hearing him call her by her first name. It conveyed sentiments of closeness and intimacy they had to deny themselves when they were Mulder and Scully. But that wasn't the case tonight. She remembered their Christmas together, how Mulder fit so well with her family. How he cared about her so much that he would never let anyone hurt her again. She pulled away from his embrace, but still held on to his hands. She started to lead him towards the bedroom. "So, you want to sleep in a real bed tonight." Dana said in the deep, sensual voice she knew drove him crazy. Mulder smiled. "That would be nice." "Your bed is too big for one person, anyway." she replied. "I know." Mulder grinned. "Mulder!" she yelped in mock shock. "You're so much fun to tease, Scully" he admitted, laughing. "Good. It should make tonight even more interesting." Too bad Mulder couldn't see the glint in her eyes. Scully sat Mulder on the bed and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her to him. He started to nuzzle her neck when she grabbed his head with both hands and turned it towards her own. "Hold that thought for a moment." Dana said as she slowly broke away from his embrace. Mulder heard her head for the bathroom and close the door behind her. 'This is it' he thought. All these bouts with insomnia, killing time by imagining what it would be like to make love to Dana Scully. He was about to find out. His only regret was that he could not see her. He wanted to remember every moment, every detail of this night. He'd thought of waiting until his vision returned, but the way Scully had been avoiding the topic of his recovery... Mulder heard the door open again, then the click of the light switch. She was getting closer to him. He could smell her delicate fragrance. He could recognize it anywhere. Enveloped in her scent, he felt safe again. Mulder felt her hands on his shoulders and wrapped his arms around her waist. He buried his face in her chest. Dana, her head leant against his, gently stroke his hair. Mulder let out a sigh; Dana held him tighter. They needed each other so much, but had always denied it. Now, they were finally surrendering freely to their need. Slowly, Fox started to stand, keeping his face close to Dana's body. With his hands making their way to her face, he was about to kiss her when he felt the soft fabric wrapped around her head. "What's this, Dana?" he asked gently, feeling the silky fabric which covered her eyes. "It's a blindfold." she explained. "Dana, you don't have to..." Mulder started. She interrupted him. "I don't have to, Fox. I want to. What we're about to do..." she hesitated. "This new phase of our relationship is really important to me. I want to feel the same way...experience this the same way you do. If you can't see me, then I shouldn't see you either. It wouldn't be fair. We're in this together." Mulder was so moved by what Scully was willing to do for him that for once in his life, Fox Mulder could not think of anything to say. He just knew that it was right. All the fear, anxieties and doubts Mulder ever had about becoming romantically involved with his F.B.I. partner dissipated. He had never felt this way about anyone in his life, and now he knew he would never be able to live without that feeling ever again. "I love you, Dana." was what he finally let out. Dana shivered at his spoken words. How much had she longed to hear him say these words? When they first admitted their feelings for each other at Christmas, he didn't let her say it. It was too soon. But now was the right time for it. Because he wanted her to know that above and beyond anything else, he loved her, pure and simple. "I love you, Fox." she whispered in his ear. They found each other's lips and kissed passionately. They just couldn't take their hands off each other. Both without sight, they were seeing with their hands instead. Dana's palms crept under Mulder's shirt, up his torso until they finally rested on his chest. They both froze for an instant, as if shocked by the electric contact of skin on skin. Mulder broke the spell, whipping his sweatshirt over his head. He burnt with the desire to feel her skin against his. He slowly started to unbutton her silk blouse, his large hands stumbing a little over the tiny buttons. "Fox, " Dana murmured in his ear. "You're driving me crazy. If you're not going to do that quickly, let me do it myself." Mulder paused, momentarily shocked. He had to remind himself that this was a very different side of Agent Scully. Scully chuckled at his reaction "Well we're supposed to be in this together, right?" she teased removing the blouse and pulling him to her once again. His reply was lost in a sigh of passion as his lips grazed the length of her neck. He felt her shiver underneath him, and felt his own body react to the surge of pleasure running through him. Continuing their exploration, Mulder's lips stumbled upon a fine metallic thread. When his tongue touched the golden cross, he froze. A rush of emotions poured through him, as he was reminded of how close he'd come to losing her. Dana tightened her grip on him. "I'm not leaving you again." she promised in his hair. She took one of his hands in hers, intertwining their fingers as they kissed passionately. Slowly, she guided his hand up to her breast, answering his hesitation. When Mulder's mouth started to follow the path his hand had taken moments before, Dana stopped thinking...for good. Fueled by emotion, passion consumed them. Not far from there, he was watchful. All he had to do was wait for the right moment. All was in place. Still tightly wrapped in Fox's arms, Dana was the first to wake up. His face was buried in her hair and she could feel his deep, even breathing on the back of her neck. Comfortable in his embrace, she started thinking about the events of the past few hours. The first thought that came to her mind was that she couldn't remember being so peaceful and happy. A smile formed on her lips. 'And don't forget satisfied, Dana.' Mulder was so intense, even in the other aspects of her life...the ones she didn't know much about until a few hours ago. He had finally expressed physically all the passion he had kept bottled secretively away from her. Her only regret was that she couldn't have seen his eyes. They were an open book to her. She had felt his muscles tense up under her fingers at first. But then, he completely relaxed at her touch. She had wanted to see the worry and despair disappear from his features, if only for a few hours. Once again, she reminded herself that Mulder wasn't a one night stand. They would do this again soon. Now she just wished she could convince herself that he would get the chance to see her too. As if to appease her worries, Mulder kissed the back of her neck. "Morning" he said in a deep husky voice, squeezing Dana. "Not quite. It's only half past midnight." Mulder had really lost all ability to tell time. "Well at least we still have the whole night ahead of us." he quipped, raising an arm to caress her hips. "Somehow, I doubt that we'll be doing much sleeping." she said, turning to face him and meeting his tender lips half way. Mulder was too lost in his actions to really hear her. "Dana," he muttered pinning her to the bed "Stop talking" She gladly complied. The shrill of Scully's cell phone brutally brought them back to earth. Before Mulder could object, Dana had already flipped him over and leapt out of bed. She cleared her throat before answering. "Hello?" she managed; part of her brain still in a faraway land. "Agent Scully? It's Delaney. I'm really sorry to disturb you this late, but I need access to some files in your office. My assignment paperwork hasn't gone through yet so security won't let me in." "Why don't you go home, Delaney. You've been working at this all day. I'll meet you at the office first thing in the morning." Dana suggested. Delaney hesitated on the other end. "I might be on to something, Agent Scully. I'd like to see the files tonight, if possible." He sounded almost apologetic. Scully sighed. She really did *not* want to leave. But she also did want to find out what Delaney had uncovered. Also, she and Mulder had agreed that their personal relationship would remain a secret. Things were complicated enough at the Bureau, no need to make it worse. Business before pleasure was the deal, and now was the time to prove it. "All right, I'll be there in fifteen minutes." she resigned herself. She hung up just in time for Delaney to miss Mulder's very audible groan. "Mulder..." Scully started, instantly snapping back into 'work mode'. "We knew this was going to happen." "Yeah, but did it have to happen right away?" he whined. Dana sat next to him on the bed, and put her hand on his bare shoulder. "I won't be long. Back before you know it. You'll wait up for me, won't you?" she purred, gently grazing his chest with her fingers. Mulder smiled. "I've waited this long, haven't I?" His hand trailed down her back as she got up to get dressed. Mulder propped himself up on his elbows. "Oh, and Scully, you should teach that new partner of yours some manners, huh." "But I'm not done with you yet..." she shot back. Mulder smirked as the double entendre sunk in. "Good thing..." "Besides" she said pushing him down and pulling the blanket up over him "You already got me in trouble with Delaney once today with your little 'memo'." She kissed his forehead tenderly and ran her hand through his tousled hair. "Goodbye, Mulder.", she finally said before closing the bedroom door behind her. "See you later, Scully." he mumbled under his breath already half lost in the memory of the last few hours. The moment was right. She was gone, and he was alone. Blind and alone. Almost too easy. Cecil L'Ively concentrated hard. A devilish smile formed on his lips. He could feel the spark ignite in Mulder's apartment. Mulder smelled the smoke. "Scully!" he yelled instinctively. But he knew she wasn't there. "Shit." He jumped out of the bed and hit his knee on the bedside table. This was not good. Keeping low on the ground to avoid bumping into furniture and the thickening smoke, Mulder crawled towards the burning smell. Once in the living room, he realized that he was close to the fire. Too close for comfort, actually. When Mulder realized that his couch was now entirely up in flames, he started to panic. Given his current predicament, he decided to abandon ship and dash for the door. He started to feel the ground and when he tried to move forward, he burnt his guiding hand. Mulder collapsed to the floor in pain. Smoke began to fill his lungs and through his coughing he heard a man laugh. Mulder recognized him instantly. He tried to lunge for him, but L'Ively anticipated his move and raised a wall of fire between them. Mulder jumped back, and screamed in fright and pain as he smelled his now burnt hair. "See, you should have just given me a light when I asked for one." L'Ively taunted. "No one's here to save your ass this time, Agent Mulder." he spit out. Smelling Mulder's burnt flesh excited him even more. He laughed. A laugh that made Mulder's skin crawl. What a lousy way to die. He could feel the increasing heat surrounding him and knew that this was it. Curled up in a corner, he knew his life was about to end. The tears began rolling down his face, soothing his burning cheeks. He cried for Scully, for leaving her alone, for leaving her now. It was so unfair. Rushing images in his head struggled for his attention. He wanted to grow old with her. He wanted to have children with her. Mulder didn't see his past flash before his eyes. He saw the future...what could have been. And the loss of their happiness hurt very, very much. "So Agent Mulder, how's this for having a smoke afterwards? And I always thought you were the consumate professional. Tsk Tsk. Well now that you've 'crashed and burned', I guess the lovely redhead is all mine" Mulder might have been blind, but the thought of L'Ively laying so much as one finger on Dana made him see red. As a final attempt, he leapt out of his crouching position and in the general direction of the laughter that was driving him insane. He fell short of landing on L'Ively, who was perversely enjoying this sick game of hide and seek. Mulder felt his sweat pants catch on fire and rolled on the floor, whimpering in pain. Then he heard the gunshot. And the dull thump of a body of a body hitting the ground. He heard her yell his name, and he smiled as he saw images of children running around, just before passing out. Georgetown University Hospital. Three days later. The light touch on his forehead was cool and soothing. Someone was smoothing his hair. No, not someone. Dana. He recognized her touch, her delicate and precise movements. His heart was bursting with joy. He wanted to grab her in his arms and hold her close to him. But his body didn't seem to want to cooperate. So he tilted his head and lightly kissed her inner forearm. He felt on his lips the shiver that went through her. Dana was beaming. A gigantic smile lit up her face. "Hey sleepyhead. About time you woke up." "Sorry, I know I promised to wait up for you." he let out between two coughs. Mulder's voice was strained. He'd taken in quite a bit of smoke. "It's okay. I don't think you'd enjoy the body contact right now. You've got second degree burns on most of your body." she explained. "And a new haircut too, I believe." Dana ran her fingers through his hair. "Hey, I like it. It gives you character!" she replied. "What happened to L'Ively?" "I blew his brains out." she answered matter-of-factly. "How did you know...why did you come back?" Mulder reached to find her hand and take it in his. "Delaney called me back on my way to the office to ask me for Phoebe Green's phone number. It clicked. He just hadn't gotten to the report section about L'Ively yet. And I recognized the MO. I guess bad habits die hard." "But didn't L'Ively send love letters to his victims' wives?" Scully blushed and coughed. "Uh, hmm, about the letters..." her voice cracked. Mulder squeezed her hand, guessing the cause of her discomfort. "Hey, if you thought his letters were hot, wait 'till you read mine..." Dana felt her temperature rising again and was not sure she was going to be able to keep a proper physician's distance. Fortunately they were interupted by a nurse with Mulder's medicine "I guess I'll have to make sure Delaney gets a good report" Scully commented desperatly searching for a safe topic as they were once again left alone. "So you two really hit it off, then?" he asked with that trademark lost puppy dog look on his face. "Well, he listens to me too much. It's no fun." she replied with a smile. "But I thought you had strict rules about not mixing work and pleasure, Special Agent Scully." he teased. There was an awkward pause when the expected lecture did not follow. Scully took a deep breath and squeezed Mulder's hand. "What is it, Dana?" he asked, concerned. "It's time to take off your bandages..." she started. Mulder understood by the tone of her voice that if he couldn't see her after that, his chances for recovery were worse than the odds against the losers of the last Super Bowl. Dana's hands expertly removed the bandage from his right eye, then his left. "Okay, Mulder. Slowly now..." Scully watched him intensely as his bloodshot hazel eyes tried to focus on an image. "Why Scully, you should have told me that you were really a blonde!" She laughed for the first time in a long time. Mulder tugged on her arms until they were nose to nose. Looking deep into her eyes, as if he had seen them for the first time... "It's good to see you, Scully." he said before kissing her soundly. "It's good to be seen, Mulder." she told him, out of breath. The end...for now. Comments to rioux@unixg.ubc.ca