~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hello out there in Cyberland! :) Here's my latest offering. It's a little different than my average MSR angst-fest. Hope you like it. :) Besides, Raquel said she needed stories, and I just happened to have one ready. DISCLAIMER: I don't own Mulder or Scully. However, I did create Deanna and poor Lauren, who only gets to talk in one scene, and all of Scully's other classmates. :) INSPIRATION: **I must acknowledge Char Hall's *wonderful* story, "Dance With Me", as the main inspiration for this story. I read it over one day, and got to wondering if I couldn't do my own 'they meet before they met' story. So, thanks go to Char, one of my best net pals. :) **Also, I must give credit to one of my other bestest net friends, Nicole Perrey. There's a movie that Scully watches in this story, that is a tribute to Nic and her latest story, "A Notorious Affair" - if you haven't read it, go do so now! I loved her story so much, that after reading it, I went out and rented the movie she based it on. Wonderful story, Nic! You'll get my comments. I promise. BIT OF TRIVIA: The dress that Scully wears in this story is supposed to be the one from GA's TV Guide centerfold, in case you're wondering. :) CREDIT: The songs found herein: "Can't Forget You" by Gloria Estefan, and "Must Have Been Love" by Roxette were used without permission, obviously ;). I didn't write them, guys. I know...you're all surprised. :) THANKS: Thanks to Melissa R. for once again editing this for me, and helping me out. Also, thanks to Jenna. STORY NOTE: This is an MSR all the way, guys. Also, since there's a discrepancy/ error in the "Official Guide to the X-Files", I had to make a judgment call about Mulder's schooling. I picked the year that made more sense to me. So, in this story, he graduated from Oxford in '82 and the FBI Academy in '84. COMMENTS: Hmm...I don't know what to put here. I guess for now, you should send all comments to: sonseearay@juno.com Thanks! Now, on to the story!! ======================================== PRE-HISTORY 1/4 by Amy Schatz Baltimore, Maryland Apartment of Dana Scully May 3, 1985 6:33 pm Dana Katherine Scully stood in front of the mirror in her bedroom and looked at her reflection critically. The more she looked, the more she was sure that the dress she had on just wasn't for her. It was a long, simple, light golden colored dress that hugged her slim figure nicely. All of that was fine. The part that bothered Dana was that it was low cut. Very low cut. All the way down to China. Well, perhaps she was exaggerating. It wasn't down to her navel or anything, but she was definitely showing a lot of cleavage. Lots and lots of cleavage. She turned to the side, smoothing the dress over her flat stomach, as her gaze went to her auburn hair. She had just gotten it cut, and tonight had curled it in a way reminiscent of the 40's. She wore dark, almost burgundy colored lipstick, and the rest of her make-up was very understated. Just some barely-there blush, and some eye-liner to bring out her eyes, which tonight had decided to be a slate-blue in color. All in all, she thought she looked fairly good. In reality, she was a knockout. After one more quick look, she turned from the mirror and headed out into the small living room of the small apartment she shared with another pre-med student. She went to their small couch, picked up her purse, and glanced out into the tiny kitchen. "Lauren?" she called. "Yeah?" the girl called back. Dana could smell popcorn. "I'm leaving now. Don't wait up." Suddenly, Lauren poked her head around the corner. She was pretty and tall, with dark straight hair, and green eyes. "I didn't hear anyone pull up," she said, her eyes scanning the room. "I know," said Dana. "I'm meeting Scott at the hotel." Lauren frowned. "What kind of a way is that? This is the junior dance, Dana. Scott could try and fit picking you up into his busy schedule." Dana scowled at her friend and roommate. "Well, you're not going." Lauren shrugged. "I think dances are stupid. Besides, the only person I'd go with is Vince, and he's overseas." Vince was Lauren's fiancee. He was in the Airforce and stationed overseas most of the time. "Well, *I'm* going," said Dana, her chin lifted, "and I'm going with Scott. If he wants to meet at the hotel, no problem. See you later, Lauren." And with that, Dana turned away, and walked out of the apartment. Moments later, Lauren heard her pulling away. * * * Washington D.C. Washington Hilton May 3, 1985 7:35 pm Agent Fox Mulder slipped out of the banquet room and headed down the hall for a little walk some air. He was wearing a sleek, black tuxedo, and bow tie. He looked very handsome all dressed-up...too bad none of the women who worked at the FBI would come with him. Not that he tried very much. Truth be told, he was quite content to be on his own. His mind still remembered a girl in England - a girl he had been willing to give his love to forever. But when he told her this, she had laughed at him, and told him to grow up - that their relationship was just for fun, and nothing more. That had certainly been a newsflash for him. He had given everything to her - to Phoebe. He had worshipped her, loved her, put her on a pedestal - and what had he gotten in return? She had ripped his heart out and kicked it aside, like so much trash. He still thought of her at least once a day - and that was what bothered him so much. After all she had done to him, he knew that he would still take her back if she asked him. So, if his mind couldn't forget her, he doubted his heart could. She would ruin any chances he might have to love someone else - and he hated her for that. They had a strange relationship, he and Phoebe. At the same time he hated and loved her, couldn't stand her and wanted her, didn't care what she thought and needed her approval. However, Mulder had decided that he *would* get over her...and he would try to trust again. To trust a woman with his heart again - but it would take a special woman, and he needed more time to heal, to recover. So for now, Mulder was content to be alone. Running a hand through his dark brown hair, he sighed, mostly in boredom. Oh, how he hated these stupid FBI functions! They were so predictable, uninteresting, and self-serving. He saw no point in aggrandizing certain agents time and again, and passing over younger, but potentially great agents. Agents like himself. Not that he wanted some ten dollar plaque to put on his apartment wall, but he wouldn't have minded some respect. Ever since he had graduated from the FBI Academy a year ago, things had been getting steadily worse. In the Academy he had been honored with the nickname `Spooky'. Spooky Mulder. Just because he could solve the pseudo-crimes that the instructor created quicker than anyone else. Just because he saw connections and could make leaps others couldn't. Oh, and there was that little matter of his devoted belief in all things paranormal. Had he known that his beliefs would make him a social outcast and the butt of jokes, he might have kept quiet. As Mulder walked down the hall, towards the lobby of the hotel and the front doors, he shook his head, "Naahhh.." * * * Washington D.C. Washington Hilton May 3, 1985 7:45 pm Dana stepped out of her car, grabbed her purse and wrap, and quickly shut the door, locking it. Looking around the parking lot, she noticed Scott's expensive car parked a few spaces away, its paint and windows gleaming in the moonlight. As she walked towards the front doors, Dana thought about Scott. About his light brown hair, his lovely blue eyes, and handsome features. Yes, he was the ultimate in cool. Everybody liked him. Everybody wanted to be with him. And all the other boys wanted to *be* him. It was unusual for a boy like him to date Dana. Normally, his type didn't even look at her. Not because she wasn't pretty. But because it was a well-known rumor that Dana was cold and normally didn't even kiss on the first date. But Scott had said that he didn't care - that he liked her so much he would gladly wait till she was ready. And for once, Dana actually believed that this boy meant it. So, she had a smile on her face as she walked to the entrance, imagining Scott's expression when she took off her wrap and he saw the dress she had worn. * * * Mulder looked up at the sound of a band playing in the banquet room across the way from the one he was supposed to be in. He smiled as he saw young, probably college kids streaming into the room, all dressed up for a formal dance. Mulder was in a prime position to watch the procession - a plush, shadowed bench that was along one side of the hallway. He leaned further back into the darkness, and did what all men do: rated the girls as they walked by. Mulder saw a few sixes, a seven and an eight, and lots of fours. He had almost given up on seeing what he considered a ten when SHE walked through the doors. * * * Dana took a deep breath as she walked up to the doors of the Hilton, and plastered a smile on her face. Then, she pulled open the doors, and glided inside. She immediately heard the band playing inside the banquet room, and then she saw all of her classmates standing outside the room, some heading inside, anxious to get the party started. She began to look around for Scott, as she slipped her wrap off, and let it hang over her arm. She felt a little self-conscious in the dress, but made herself calm down, and accept that the dress looked good on her and that Scott would like it. So, after a small, internal pep-talk, she stepped forward and walked into the room. * * * The moment he saw her, he knew that he was privy to observing the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. His gaze had been caught on her from the moment she walked inside. She was a vision...an angel...a goddess. She was slim, with flame- red hair, and skin the color of Porcelain. He couldn't tell what color her eyes were, but he was sure that whatever the color, they were eyes he could get lost in...eyes that might look at him with compassion....and maybe even affection. Then she took her cover-up off, and he almost gasped. The dress she wore was magnificent! It was a pale gold, and hugged her trim body in all the right places, and was *very* low cut, even by Mulder's standards. He could see her perfectly crafted collar bone, her smooth, white skin, and the curve of her breasts. But somehow, the dress didn't look cheap or trashy on her. On this woman, it looked glamorous - as if she were a movie star. He could tell she was young - that was evident in her step and just her overall aura. But it also looked as though she had been hardened by life, and that saddened him, though he couldn't understand why he suddenly cared so much about this girl. Why she had touched such a deep, secret place in him. He watched, breathlessly, as she walked into the banquet room, and disappeared. Mulder wanted nothing more than to go up to her, talk to her, look into her eyes, but he guessed that she probably had a date for that dance. Besides, if his track record was accurate, she would laugh at him, and walk away. He didn't need that right now - didn't need her to kill the only surviving part of his heart. He sighed, and closed his eyes, imagining how it might feel to dance with her. * * * * * * University Of Maryland's Junior Dance Baltimore Room 7:52 pm The minute Dana walked into the banquet room, she began looking for Scott. She couldn't understand why he hadn't been waiting for her outside of the room, as he had promised. She kept telling herself, that he was probably just inside, joking with some of his friends. But deep inside her heart, she didn't believe it. Dana had been hurt by so many boys, that she found it hard to trust them. But Scott had been different. He had been so sweet and sincere with her that she had seen no reason not to believe him. Now she wondered if he had ever been truthful with her. Dana walked past a small group of girls, and when they saw her, they immediately burst into giggles and whispers. Dana was used to this - other students ostracized her because of her great intelligence and sharp wit. They were at once envious and in awe of her, so the only thing they could do was make fun of her and leave her out of things. And they did that very well. She turned sharply when she heard her name whispered, and glared at the girls. They were what she classified as 'gigglers'. Girls that were always popular, always on the A- List, always wanted by boys, but usually devoid of much brainpower and responsibility. They always knew where they best parties were, but they could never seem to remember the reading assignment for class. Finally, one of them - the leader of the group - stepped forward, her dark eyes flashing and spoke. "Well, well, girls. If it isn't Miss Polar Icecap herself...and all dressed up for her special beau!" Dana's blue eyes slid from a warm blue to blue ice as her hands flew to her hips. She looked hard at the girl in front of her. Her name was Deanna, and she was the captain of the cheerleading squad. She had long, dark hair that tonight was swept up, and was wearing a red, sequined dress that left little to the imagination. her little voice pointed out. Dana told it to shut up. "What's your problem, Deanna?" Deanna's dark eyes flew to the dance floor, where some couples were moving together slowly. "Missing someone, Icy?" she asked bitterly. Dana ignored the petty name-calling and followed Deanna's gaze. Her eyes swept over the couples but screeched to a halt on one particular couple. Scott and another girl. They were dancing closely, his hand low on her bare back, her head on his shoulder, his lips gently brushing her forehead. Dana felt the tears immediately spring to her eyes as she realized that no man would ever hold her that way, but she blinked them back. She would never cry in front of Deanna and her pack of cronies. "Guess that dress was for nothing, huh, Miss Icicle?" said Deanna, looking back at her friends and smiling. Dana was so shocked and hurt that she couldn't even talk at first. Finally, she composed herself - put the mask of no emotion on - and turned to look at Deanna. "What do you mean?" Deanna smirked. "Don't you know who that is? That's Colleen, Scott's old girlfriend." Dana shook her head, her mouth gaping. "No...no...they broke up..." Deanna nodded. "Yeah, a month ago...which is why he asked *you* to this dance. He was so damn desperate that he had to stoop down to *your* level. Anyway, looks like the break-up wasn't so permanent, cause from what I hear, they're back together." Dana felt as though someone had shot an arrow through her heart. She had never felt such pain, been hurt so deeply, or been so humiliated in all her life. She stepped back, closing her eyes. "Oh look, girls," said Deanna gleefully, "maybe the Ice Queen *does* have feelings. I think she's going to cry." Dana vaguely heard one of the other girls suggest that perhaps enough have been said, but she wasn't really paying attention. All she could think of was what a fool she looked like. All dressed up and *no one* to care. Now she looked pathetic and desperate, as if she would go out with any boy - even those who were just on the rebound. She stepped back again, wanting nothing more than for the floor to swallow her up. Deanna put her arm around Dana, and swiveled her around, pushing her towards the entrance. "I think it's time you were going, don't you?" Dana didn't respond - what was there to say? She had been deceived once again. She didn't protest as Deanna walked her out into the hallway. * * * Mulder had given up hope of seeing the red-haired girl again, and was about to get up and dutifully return to the FBI dinner, when he saw a flash of gold. He looked up and saw a tall, dark-haired girl push his flaming angel out of the room. Once outside, the tall girl leaned close and whispered something into the other girl's ear, smiled wickedly, patted her on the shoulder, and then turned, walking back inside, closing the doors behind her. Mulder watched as a look of extreme pain passed over the girl's face, and she swiped at her eyes. Then, he heard a small, soft sob escape her lips as she broke into a run down the hall, heading for the shadows. He had to follow her. It was as if he were being pulled to her, and had no choice but to go to her. He followed her carefully, as he had been taught to do in the Academy. Soon, she slowed down and sank onto a bench, crying softly. He watched her for a few moments, and then, when he couldn't stand it any longer, stepped before her, coughing to announce his presence. "Excuse me?" Her head shot up as if she had been struck, and Mulder found himself looking into her deep, blue eyes. Eyes that were filled with tears. And pain. "What do *you* want?" she asked, her voice bitter. "Did Deanna send you to finish me off?" Mulder opened his mouth, but found that he had nothing to say. Dana lifted her chin, ready for whatever this idiot had planned to dish out. "Well, come on!" she shouted. "Just say whatever it is you came to say!" She pushed herself off of the bench, and stood toe to toe with him, even though she was much shorter. "What will it be? Icicle? Miss Polar Icecap? Arctic Girl? Icy? Or maybe you like the long running favorite...Ice Queen!" Mulder's eyes widened. Did she mean that people called her those awful names? 'Spooky' seemed to pale in comparison. He held his hands up in a gesture of subordination, and when he spoke, it was softly and gently. "Miss, I don't know what you're talking about. I saw that you were apparently in distress, and I wanted to see if you were all right." Dana looked at him - really *looked* at him - and realized that she didn't know him. She had been so wrapped up in her anger and hurt that she had just reacted. Hadn't bothered to find out all the facts before she started screaming. Finally, she lowered her head, closing her eyes, and sank back down onto the bench. Mulder looked at her for a few seconds before he sat down next to her, wanting nothing more than to take her in his arms and hold her close. But he didn't - he held back - because he didn't know what she wanted. "What happened?" he finally asked. She didn't look at him. Dana never could stand for anyone else to see her weak side. "The usual," she said at last. "What's `the usual'?" She shrugged her shoulders. "Tonight's the Junior Dance for my University. When I got here, I found the boy that asked me here dancing with his ex-girlfriend. Apparently the `ex' part has been taken out of the equation." Mulder nodded. "And *that's* why you're crying." She looked up at him sternly, hating the idea that he thought she was some simpering girl who just cried at the drop of a hat. "It's only *part* of the reason." Mulder smiled at her spirit, recognizing her determination in himself. "And what's the other part?" "I've always been called names," she admitted casually, as if it meant nothing to her, though Mulder could tell it hurt her deeply. "Tonight, when I walked inside, a few girls were *nice* enough to show me Scott and his girlfriend dancing. They also made it a point to call me as many names as they could. It just...hurts." Mulder nodded, completely understanding. "Why do they call you those names?" She shrugged again, wiping at her eyes. "Probably because I'm smarter than they are, to be honest. Because I understand things quicker, and the teachers like me because I always do my work. They're just jealous." Mulder grinned, her answer answering one of his long-time questions. "Yeah, that must be the reason." Dana looked at him strangely, but said nothing. "You know," he said demurely, "people call me names, too." "They do?" she asked, wondering why anyone would have reason to tease this man. He was kind, considerate, polite, and oh yes, there was that small matter of his devastating good looks, his smoky hazel eyes, and wonderfully tousled dark-brown hair. He nodded, a lopsided grin in place. "They call me `Spooky'." Dana couldn't suppress a small grin, as she imagined grown people calling him that name. "Why?" she asked. He looked down. "Same reason as you, I guess," he said. He wasn't about to tell her that he believed in aliens and spirits. "Are you in school as well?" she finally asked, when she was sure she wouldn't laugh out loud. She never bothered to notice that her tears had dried, and her spirits had lifted. Mulder chuckled. "Not now, no. I graduated from the FBI Academy a year ago, and since then I've been assigned to the Violent Crimes Section." A small shadow of pain passed over his face when he mentioned this, but Dana chose to let it go. "Really?" she asked, truly impressed. "That sounds like an interesting profession." "It can be," he answered. "Helping people to close a chapter in their life can feel good. When we solve a murder or find a missing person, we help those left behind to move on...it's almost therapeutic." Dana nodded, smiling slightly. "You sure sound like a therapist." Mulder grinned crookedly. "Psychologist, actually. Oxford University, class of `82." "Oxford? Wow...sounds like you've been around." For some reason, when she said that, an image of Phoebe popped into Mulder's mind. She was there before him, taunting and cocky as ever, a wicked smile on her face. As he thought of her, Mulder realized that he didn't feel the same ache in his chest as he usually did. Glancing back to the girl before him, he smiled. Maybe she was the reason. "Well, you're no slouch yourself, I'd say," he answered. "What university do you attend?" Dana cleared her throat, and looked off down the hall, back at her past. "I attended the University of California, at Berkeley, because my father was stationed at Alameda. Then, I transferred to the University of Maryland for my second year. I'll be a senior next semester." Mulder nodded, looking at her approvingly. He had noticed that when she had spoken of her father, her voice and eyes had softened. "What's your major?" he asked, following the classic line of questioning. Dana's back straightened and her chin lifted a bit, as she proudly answered, "Pre-med." "Now it's my turn to say wow," said Mulder, truly impressed by this woman - the woman of his dreams. Beautiful *and* smart? He was in heaven. "Well," she finally said, sighing, "I don't want to keep you. I'm sure your date is waiting for you." Mulder looked down at his tux, realizing that she had supposed he *had* a date. He chuckled mirthlessly. "Nope. No date. No girl would have me." he thought. "What?" she cried, before she could stop herself. *That* idea was simply unimaginable. "It's true," he said, suppressing a smile. "Besides, it's just a stuffy FBI banquet. Yawn City. I'm glad to be out of there." "Oh..." said Dana, looking down at her hands. She knew that she should just leave. Go home and prepare herself for Monday morning when she would have to face Deanna, Scott, Colleen, and everyone. But for some reason, she didn't want to leave this man. She felt drawn to him, like a moth to a flame, and she suddenly wasn't afraid of being burned. She also felt safe with him, which was truly ridiculous, since she didn't even know him. She suddenly realized that she didn't even know his name - and she wanted to know it, since she intended to never forget him. Turning to look at him, she said, "By the way, what's your name?" He was about to tell her to call him Mulder, when he stopped. This girl was special. She deserved to call him something special - something that would be just between them. So, since he didn't allow anyone - not even her - to call him by his first name, he opted for the next best thing. "It's William." Even though Mulder hated his father for his coldness and inability to love, he didn't mind the name. And he had a feeling that when *she* spoke it, he would forget all about his cruel, unfeeling father. Dana smiled. She had always liked the name William, for more reasons than one. "Really?" she asked. "That's my father's name." Mulder's eyes widened. Both their fathers' names were William? That had to be more than a coincidence - maybe it was a sign. "And your name?" he asked, not divulging this newly learned information. At first she was going to say Dana, but then she decided against it. Everyone knew her as 'Dana'. This man was uncommon - unique. So, she would give him a gift and let him call her by her middle name - which only her grandmother used. "Katherine," she answered, suddenly feeling the urge to take his hand. She did not. Mulder smiled. "Katherine," he said, trying the name out. "It's a beautiful name." She smiled, almost blushing, and bowed her head, accepting his compliment. "So, William, how long have you been shirking your duty by sitting out here?" she asked playfully. He grinned again - that wonderful, lopsided grin that was almost a leer. "Not too long. Just long enough to see you make your grand entrance." Dana's eyes went wide. "Oh, you did, huh?" He nodded. "Yep. I was sitting out here rating the girls as they went by. I can't help but do it, really. It's programmed into the Y chromosome." Dana snickered at this remark. "And what sort of scale were you using?" "One to ten," he replied casually, looking down the hall at the closed doors of the banquet hall where the dance was being held. "I saw a six, a seven, an eight, lots of fours..." "And what did I get?" asked Dana, not knowing where she was getting this courage. She guessed that he would be kind and say five, when he would really be thinking a three. "Oh, you... Well, you see, when I first saw you I was so awed, that I couldn't even perform my calculations. But, I finally recovered, and I'm afraid I had no choice but to give you..." she thought, wishing she had never asked him, never opened herself up to this humiliation. "....an eleven," he finally finished, looking at her with his most brilliant smile. This time she really did blush, and then she leaned close to him, and kissed him softly on the cheek - something she had wanted to do since she first saw him. As she pulled away, she whispered, "Thank you." Mulder was in a daze - spellbound by this red-haired nymph who was changing his whole outlook on life. His bitter idea of love was quickly fading - along with his memories of Phoebe. Suddenly, he was seeing a future, a family, children, someone to love, and someplace he could call home. He reached out and took her hand in his, pulling her back to him. "Let's try that again, shall we? I think I have better aim." And with that, he leaned down and pressed his lips to hers in the most electric, sensual kiss he had ever experienced. As they kissed, Mulder's world shrunk to just this woman, and how she made him feel. He realized that he never wanted to leave this woman - didn't think he could bear to be without her, without her spirit, her warmth, her intelligence, her kiss. When they parted, they were both breathless and flushed, but smiling. Mulder pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her, loving the feel of her body against his. "That," he said, "was the most amazing thing I have ever felt." Dana sighed contentedly, tightening her arms around his waist. "Me, too." They were silent, then, until she voiced the question in both their minds. "What are we going to do about it?" Mulder didn't answer her because he didn't know. What could they do? By his estimation, she was only twenty-one, and he was twenty-four. He knew that age wouldn't be a problem, and it was very apparent that they would have no lack of things to discuss, and well, then there was that mind-blowing chemistry they seemed to have. But he didn't want to tarnish her life with his reputation. She was just starting out. He was well-known in all the hospitals - he seemed to end up there a lot - and she was pre- med. If any of her employers found out that she was Spooky Mulder's girlfriend, it might not go over too well. Suddenly, Mulder realized something. Twenty minutes ago, he was practically swearing off women - all because of Phoebe and the way she had destroyed his heart. And now, this woman, this girl was making him forget all that - making him *feel* again. Trust again. "I don't know, Katherine," he finally said, even though he did know. He knew that he would have to let her go - she would be better off without him, anyway. They fell silent again, just enjoying being close. As they sat there, Mulder's eyes traveled back down to those closed doors - doors that Katherine had been pushed out of a little while ago. He decided that she would walk back in there, and show all those petty, pathetic people who the real queen of the ball was. "I know something we can do, Katherine." Dana looked up at him, her face totally open and trusting. "What?" Mulder stood up, and held his hand out to her. "We can attend your dance." Dana's first instinct was to refuse, because she didn't want to have to endure the cruelties of those people - especially not in front of William. But, there was something about the way his hazel eyes burned into her that made it impossible to deny him this request. She smiled grandly, and rose, taking his hand with a flourish. "If you insist." * * * * * * University of Maryland's Junior Dance Baltimore Room 8:20 pm When the doors of the Baltimore Room opened, and Dana Scully walked inside with the most handsome man there, no one was more surprised than Deanna. She had been enjoying the night quite nicely ever since she got to rain on Little Miss Icy's parade, so this new development did not make her happy. She watched as Dana and the mystery man walked out onto the dance floor, and drew close together. Well, this could not be tolerated! Deanna would not allow it. She disentangled herself from the boy she was dancing with, and stalked across the dance floor to Dana. Tapping Dana on the shoulder, she spoke in her sweetest tone. "Excuse me, Icy, but I'm cutting in." Once this pretty- boy got a look at her, Deanna was sure he would forget all about the Popsicle. Dana looked up at Mulder regretfully, and then stepped back, her polite up-bringing kicking in. But Mulder wouldn't let her go so easily. He slipped his arms around her waist, and pulled her back against him. Then he looked straight at Deanna, anger in his hazel eyes. "I'm sorry, *Miss*, but I have no desire to dance with you." Deanna's jaw dropped, and her hands immediately flew to her hips. "What? You have to! It's not polite to refuse!" Mulder shrugged. "Since you have shown no respect for my date, why should I show any for you?" he asked, hating this girl on sight. Deanna was speechless. No one had ever spoken to her like that in her life - no one had ever had the nerve. All her life she had been pampered by her parents, grandparents, friends, everyone. And no boy had *ever* refused her. Ever. So, she centered her anger on Dana - an easy target. Turning to look at Dana, she said, "What did you do, put a spell on him? You are the Ice Witch!" Dana's eyes widened, and she stepped back from Mulder again. She had decided that she had had just about enough of this airhead. "Listen to me, you pathetic bitch! I am sick to death of your petty name-calling. Just leave me alone from now on." Deanna was awed, to say the least. Dana had never been so aggressive in her whole life - at least not while in Deanna's presence. She was about to respond, when Mulder took Dana's hand, a small, tight smile on his lips. "I think everything's clear now." With that, he led Dana off into a more secluded corner of the dance floor. They left Deanna standing there all alone. * * * Washington D.C. Rooftop of the Washington Hilton 11:21 pm Mulder and Dana had spent the rest of the night strolling the halls of the hotel together, sitting close on what they considered `their' bench, and had finally come up to the roof - to watch the stars. They had only danced for two songs after the confrontation with Deanna. Dana had seen no point in belaboring the issue of Deanna's downfall too long. Sure, it might feel good right then, but invariably, tomorrow she would think herself no better than the girl who had been her nemesis for so long. And now the night was drawing to a close and neither of them wanted to leave each other. They seemed to be two parts of the same whole - yin and yang; day and night. Both different and unique, but both needing the other in order for things to be as they should. When Mulder started a sentence, Dana could finish it eight times out of ten. And they seemed to be drawn to each other by some powerful force. In theory, they were very different, but as they saying goes: opposites attract. And that phrase was never so true for Mulder and Dana. So, they stood looking out across the city's nightscape, holding each other close. Dana stood in front of Mulder, leaning against his chest, while his arms were around her. The moon was half full and cast a ghostly light upon the objects on the roof. Mulder was fascinated by the way it's light picked up the amazing reds and golds in Katherine's hair. As he thought of her, he decided that Katherine was the perfect name for her. It sounded like the name of some princess from a faraway, fantasy world. Princess Katherine of Cassima - or something like that. He could just imagine her wearing a white, fluid, almost diaphanous gown, her hair flowing across her shoulders, her blue eyes blazing, as she nearly floated down a huge flight of stairs. And as she came to the landing, a trumpet would sound, and a man with a stiff accent would announce the arrival of Princess Katherine... ...And maybe, he would step out of the shadows. The Dark Prince who would sweep her off her feet... he said to himself. Nodding in admittance of that fact, he took a deep breath, hoping to clear his head. Then he tightened his hold on Katherine, memories of their fevered kisses shared moments before swimming through his mind, and sighed. Because he knew that soon, she would be gone, and he would probably never see her again. "Katherine?" "Yes?" "Do you believe there's life out there?" "Where?" He pointed up at the stars - a place he often thought his sister might be - and said, "Up there. In the stars." He held his breath. She didn't answer for a few moments. "Well, I think there's an equal possibility that there is or there isn't. And as Carl Sagan says, `Either possibility is equally frightening.'" Mulder was stunned at the intelligence and respect of her answer. He had expected her to scoff at such a question, and refuse to even discuss it. But not his red-haired princess. No, she listened to his question, thought about it, and then gave him her honest opinion. he said to himself, And then another thought occurred to him: maybe he already did. "That's an interesting viewpoint," he said out loud. "I've always thought Carl Sagan was an ass, and I never thought he could say something so profound." Dana chuckled. "Honestly, I think he's an ass, too." Mulder actually laughed, then. "I knew I would like you," he replied. She turned around in his arms, and wrapped her arms around his waist, leaning her head against his chest. "And when did you know that?" He cocked his head to one side. "Oh, I think about ten seconds after I saw you." He felt her smile, then, and leaned down to kiss her forehead. "I don't want to let you go," he admitted, looking straight at her. She looked up at him, a soft smile on her lips. "I don't want to go." "Then what are we going to do about it?" he asked, hoping that she would have an answer. She seemed so mature and together, that he was already looking to her for answers and guidance. She sighed, and shrugged her shoulders. "All I know is that I want to see you again. Now, since I'm pretty sure you feel the same, we have to figure out how to make that happen." "You mean you want to go out with me?" he asked incredulously. She pulled away from him, a grin on her face. "Of course I do!" He shook his head. "Wow, I can't believe it. A girl like you actually wants to go out with me..." He sounded so surprised that Dana felt tears spring to her eyes. It was obvious that William's life had been devoid of love for a long time. That his love had been treated as second rate - not worthy for real consideration. Perhaps she could be the one to put love back into his life - to show him how valuable his love was. "William, any girl would be *lucky* to go out with you. Please remember that." And then she stepped close to him and kissed him softly, loving the feel of his lips against hers, his hands on her body, his arms around her. Mulder was never so happy. He couldn't believe this was happening to him - that Katherine actually wanted to be with him. It was a dream come true - and this time it was a good dream. He had a feeling that if he was with her, the nightmares might stay away forever. So, they formulated a working plan on how they could see each other again...and again...and again... They exchanged numbers and Mulder promised to call her within one week. If he did not, she would call him, and they would set up a time and place to meet. It seemed simple enough. And it should have worked. Afterwards, they stayed a little while longer on the roof - just being together. But finally, Dana pulled away from him, and looked away. "I think I better be going now." Mulder's face took on the look of a puppy that had just been smacked with a newspaper. "Stay," was his single plea. Dana looked back at him, tears in her eyes for the second time that night, but for such a totally different reason. She shook her head, breathing deeply to control the emotions raging inside her. "I can't. The longer I stay, the harder it'll be to go." Mulder stepped close to her, taking her hand. "Then don't go. Come home with me." She was so tempted...she really was. Just the thought of being *that* close to William sent chills up and down her spine, and her head to spinning. But she knew she couldn't. She wasn't that kind of girl. Her parents had always told her to find a man who respected her and would wait for her. In her heart, Dana knew that she had found that man in William, but she still held back. After all, he might have to wait a while - maybe until she graduated. Could he do that? She didn't think so. He would tire of waiting and find another girl who wouldn't hesitate at all. It wasn't that she doubted William's feelings for her - they were quite evident in his eyes, and the way he touched her. It was just that she knew all about the human body, and she knew that even the most devoted of men could only fight their body for so long. "William, I'd like nothing more than to go home with you-" "Then do it," Mulder said, cutting her off. "I can't. I'm afraid that if I go home with you, I'd never want to leave, never want to finish school. I could lose myself in you..." Mulder looked hurt at first, but then that faded into understanding. He knew exactly what she meant. He, too, could lose himself in her - in her smoky blue eyes, her milk-white skin, her intelligent mind, her capacity to love. He also knew that if she did come home with him, and they spent the night together, and then she left the next morning, he would be miserable - because one night would never be enough for them. He sighed, not knowing what to say. "What is between us, William, is very powerful." He nodded, agreeing. "I think it might be too much for us at so young an age. I think it would devour us, and maybe drive a wedge between us." "Katherine, you're making it sound like this...thing between us is a bad thing. It isn't. It's not evil." Dana's eyes widened. "Oh, I never meant that!" she exclaimed. "I just mean that I think we're a little too young to handle this. Maybe in a few years-" "A few years!" Mulder cried. "Katherine, I can't be apart from you for that long. I wouldn't be able to stand it." His voice was so soft and desperate that Dana couldn't help but move to wrap him in her arms, and hold him close. And the moment they were together, she knew that this was the man with whom she was meant to spend the rest of her life. However, she also knew, with the same certainty, that that `life' couldn't start just yet. They both had some more growing and changing to do - more evolving. She had to finish her schooling, and then decide what she wanted to do with her medical degree. And he had to go on helping people solve mysteries, and find loved ones. And no matter how long they were apart - how many miles or years separated them - she knew that one day, they would meet each other again. And one day, they would love each other again. Dana finally pulled apart from him, and looked up at him. When she did, he had tears in his eyes, and one had slipped down his cheek. She reached up and swept it away tenderly, then let her hand rest on his cheek. He turned his face into her palm and closed his eyes peacefully. "We must be strong," she said, her eyes now a steely blue - full of determination. He nodded slowly, in defeat. "I know. I just don't know if I have that much strength." "You do," she said decisively, her hand slipping down his neck, his collarbone, his chest, to find his hand. He squeezed her hand. "But how will I find you?" "I don't know. I just know that you will - that *we* will - find each other when the time is right." Suddenly, Mulder's solemn expression changed into an impish smile. "Why, Katherine, are you psychic?" She grinned up at him. "Wouldn't you like to know..." And then, just as suddenly, his expression returned to that lost, somber look. "I'd like to know anything you want to tell me." She smiled sadly. "I'll tell you everything...one day." Mulder nodded, taking a step towards the door that led to the lower levels. "Then I will be waiting for that day to come." She smiled, and stepped close to kiss him one last time. It was a long, sweet, passionate kiss that held the promise of a day when they would be together again. Soon after that, Dana pulled away, looking at him with a sorrowful smile. "I think you better go before I won't let you go," said Mulder, letting her hand slip out of his. She nodded, and took a step away from him, tears shining in her eyes. "Goodbye...William..." He smiled after her, watching as she walked over to the door, and only spoke when she opened it. "Goodbye, Katherine," he said softly. She turned at the sound of his voice, and looked back at him. Dana waved once to him, and then turned to walk down the stairs, vanishing from his sight. The moment she was gone, Mulder felt tears well up in his eyes, and this time he let them fall, as he turned back to the cityscape...and the stars. As he looked at them his mind and heart were full of Katherine. And Phoebe was nowhere to be found. "Goodbye, Katherine, Princess of the Night," he said aloud. "I will *not* forget you..." * * * Mulder's Apartment Alexandria, Virginia May 6, 1985 7:43 pm Mulder sat on his couch a few days later, totally depressed and miserable. He wanted to call Katherine desperately, but he wouldn't let himself. All he could think about was her soft, fiery hair, skin the color of Alabaster, and eyes like a summer sky. Her indomitable will, untamable spirit, and brilliant mind. In his mind, she eclipsed all other women he had ever known - or would ever know. And so, he wanted to call her as he wanted nothing else...well, there was *one* thing he wanted more...but now nothing even close to that was possible. Sighing, he sank back into his couch, and closed his eyes. Back on that night, he felt so righteous - so positive that letting her go was the right thing. Now he hated himself for being such an idiot. How could he let someone so amazing disappear into the night? Mulder knew, deep in his heart, that he would never see her again. And he also knew that if he didn't, he would curl up and die. the voice inside of him said. But he shook his head. Besides, Mulder had always believed in an old saying - it was one that helped him come to terms with Sam's disappearance. When he was a young boy, and would awaken crying from a nightmare, and run to his mother asking her why Sam was gone, she would always tell him the same thing. "Fox, a wise man once said, `If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was.' Do you understand?" And he would nod, though he didn't understand, and walk back to his cold, dark room. But now, for the first time in his life, Mulder understood what that saying meant. He understood, because this was the first time he had really lived it - the first time it had cut at his soul so precisely. He wrapped his arms around himself as the lines of a song ran through his mind. Normally, he would laugh at such a sappy love song, but this time he found the words to be honest and true...and no laughing matter. <...But I can't forget you, can't break free I only have myself to blame Nothing feels the same without you We can find tomorrow what we lost yesterday...> * * * Dana's Apartment Baltimore, Maryland May 6, 1985 7:50 pm Dana lay in her bed underneath her softest comforter, wearing her favorite silk pajamas, watching her favorite old movie, 'Notorious', and cried pitifully. She missed William so much that she felt a tangible ache inside herself. She missed his warm hazel eyes, his crooked smile, his lean form, the way he touched her, kissed her. Dana had met other men before - had even thought she'd fallen for other men before - but this was *so* different. This was a sense of loss so deep that she couldn't think of anything else, anyone else. She was sure that Lauren thought she had lost her mind. Lauren would knock on her door every once and a while, and ask if she was all right, and Dana would tell her to go away. Finally, Lauren stopped coming back. Dana hated herself for letting William go - for being so afraid to love him totally. And because of that fear, she had lost the best thing that had ever happened to her. She turned the movie off, finding its romantic undertones painful, and found that the TV was on some bulletin board channel that played music. Closing her eyes, she listened to the song that was playing. <...It must have been love But it's over now It must have been good But I lost it somehow >From the moment we touched Till the time had run out It must have been love...> * * * * * * Mulder's Apartment Alexandria, Virginia July 15, 1996 5:55 am Mulder woke from a pleasant dream, calling her name. He rolled over onto his back, and reached out for her, mumbling, "Katherine, Katherine..." And suddenly, his eyes snapped open, and he remembered where he was, and *when* he was. For a moment or two, he had thought that he was back in time, back with *her*. But the cruel light of morning showed him that he was alone - as always. Mulder rubbed his eyes, and then rose from the couch, making his way into his bedroom. He was looking forward to a shower, and getting in to work. Work. That would help him forget about her. After all, he hadn't thought of her in years - and only dreamt of her once in a while. He wondered why he had dreamed about her last night. Something must have triggered it. But what? As he stepped into the shower, he thought about the previous night. He and Scully had worked late at the office, finishing up some paperwork and reports. Then they had gone out to dinner, talked amiably and laughed, while Mulder wondered when it was, exactly, that he had fallen for her. When Katherine had slipped away into memory, and Scully had become *the one*. Even Phoebe's memory wasn't as strong as Katherine's. He knew now that he had simply been spellbound by Phoebe's machinations. He realized now that he had never loved her - but he had loved Katherine from the first moment. Mulder remembered telling Scully once that it had taken him ten years to forget about Phoebe. That wasn't really true. He had forgotten about Phoebe the moment he had kissed Katherine, and it had taken from then till he met Scully to forget about Katherine. After all, he had told himself that he would wait for Katherine forever - that he would never find someone as beautiful or intelligent - never find someone that he would feel that intense spark with again. But he had found all of those things in Scully, and so Katherine had slowly faded away - only to be thought of on nights when he was prone to reminiscing. After Mulder had dropped Scully off at her apartment, he had gone home, collapsed on the couch with an old sci-fi movie, and had drifted off to sleep. He had been awakened in the middle of the night by a frantic phone call from Scully. She had had a nightmare, and needed to talk to him, to hear his voice. So, they had talked for about a half hour, and then Mulder had gone back to sleep. So what had provoked this dream of Katherine and that night they had shared? Mulder stepped out of the shower and walked into his bedroom, and to his closet, opening it to pick out a suit. After making his choice, he threw the suit on the bed he never used, and walked over to his dresser to retrieve some boxers and an undershirt. As he rifled through the drawers, he glanced up at the pictures on the dresser. One of Sam from a happy summer on the Cape. One of his mother. And one of Scully that her mother had given him when Scully was missing. Scully didn't even know he had it - and luckily, Mrs. Scully had told him he could keep it. It was now one of his most treasured possessions. He even took it with him on cases - something familiar to look at in all the unfamiliar places they ended up. In the picture, he saw a younger Scully, perhaps three years ago - before all the terrible things happened. She was standing on the beach, laughing, the sun shining, catching the red-gold highlights in her hair, her bright blue eyes leaping out at him. And that's when it hit him. It hit him so hard he staggered backwards and slumped down onto the bed, as memories assaulted him. / / / <"What will it be? Icicle? Miss Polar Icecap? Arctic Girl? Icy? Or maybe you like the long running favorite...Ice Queen!"> <"I attended the University of California, at Berkeley, because my father was stationed at Alameda. Then, I transferred to the University of Maryland for my second year. I'll be a senior next semester."> <"What's your major?" "Pre-med."> <"By the way, what's your name?" "It's William." "Really? That's my father's name."> <"And your name?" "Katherine." "Katherine. It's a beautiful name."> <"And what did I get?" "Oh, you... Well, you see, when I first saw you I was so awed, that I couldn't even perform my calculations. But, I finally recovered, and I'm afraid I had no choice but to give you...an eleven."> <"Katherine?" "Yes?" "Do you believe there's life out there?" "Where?" "Up there. In the stars." "Well, I think there's an equal possibility that there is or there isn't. And as Carl Sagan says, `Either possibility is equally frightening.'"> <"But how will I find you?" "I don't know. I just know that you will - that *we* will - find each other when the time is right."> / / / Mulder was suddenly very dizzy. He couldn't believe this...it couldn't be true...Scully just couldn't be Katherine. But then Mulder thought about Katherine - not knowing that he did it through the eyes of romance. He remembered her flaming hair, the sparkle of her blue eyes, the small frame of her perfect body. The way her skin begged him to touch it forever. The way her lips had seemed to be made to fit perfectly with his. The way her body melted against his when they embraced. Her fierce will and determination - how she faced life head on, and wouldn't back down. The light of innocence and truth he had seen in her eyes. Mulder had been able to tell that she was a ferocious warrior. And then his mind compared that girl to the woman he knew as Scully. To Scully's silky auburn hair, her penetrating blue eyes, and creamy skin that had just a dusting of freckles. Her sharp mind - the way she could figure out almost any puzzle. But where Katherine had a naivet?, he could see the light of reality in Scully's eyes. Katherine hadn't known what life had in store for her, Scully had been subjected to life's harshest cruelties, and survived. And Scully didn't let her small stature get in the way of more important things. He had seen her intimidate men twice her size. Scully seemed to live to the saying, "In for a penny, in for a pound." After all, she was still with him, even after all the terrible things that had happened. She still stood by him, defended him, protected him no matter what. She had become his staunchest ally, his most treasured companion and confidante. The woman he had gradually fallen in love with over the past four years. And what really floored Mulder was that somehow, she still managed to maintain her feminism. No matter how tough she acted, Mulder still thought of her as a woman - a woman he desperately wanted. Scully had a way of looking at him, or touching him in a totally innocent way that would make Mulder want her so badly, he would forget his name. Of course, he never said anything about it - and he hoped to God he hid it well. But that desire, those feelings were always there, just under the surface. He remembered their first case together when Scully had come to his room and taken her robe off, asking him to look at some marks on her back. The minute Mulder had touched her, he had felt a serious case of deja'vous - almost as though he had come home. And as he had touched her, studied the marks, unbidden, an image of Katherine had popped into his mind. At the time, he hadn't known why, and had dismissed it. But now, if what he suspected was true, he understood why his subconscious had been reminded of Katherine when he touched Scully. It was because Katherine *was* Scully. Mulder had held off telling Scully about his feelings, because he wasn't sure she felt the same, and didn't want to open himself up to rejection. But now....what was to stop him? He knew that Katherine loved him...that meant that Scully had to as well. Half an hour later, Mulder was dressed, had some juice, and ran out the door, intent on getting to work. After all, the woman of his dreams was waiting for him. * * * J. Edgar Hoover Building X-Files Office 8:07 am Scully sat at her desk, valiantly trying to keep her mind on the report she was supposed to be finishing. But, try as she might, she couldn't stop her mind from drifting off. Last night she had had a dream about someone she hadn't thought about in years. William. She had dreamed that she ran into him in a restaurant - when she was dressed up for dinner. And in her dream, he had never looked better - all lanky, dark hair tousled, his hazel eyes laughing at her. They had danced close - just like they did that night so long ago. And she had been in heaven. All the love she felt for William came flooding back - back from that place deep inside her. Of course, now Scully recognized that love for what it was - a path that could never be taken. William was the first man she had ever felt anything for - the first to make her feel love for a man - and for that, she would always be grateful. But, she had moved on with her life - had let him slip into a fond memory. She knew exactly when it had happened - when William became more the subject for dreams than for reality. The moment she had met Fox Mulder. Scully had immediately thought of William that first day when Mulder had turned around and shook her hand. They had the same irresistible, soft-looking , dark-brown hair, the same sleepy hazel eyes, and the same rapier wit. And they were both as handsome as the devil. Over the years, as she got to know Mulder, she realized that he was kind also kind, patient, and cared for her - just like William. But where William was younger and more innocent, Mulder had the look of a man who had been abandoned, betrayed, and laughed at. Mulder had been hardened by life, and now had a hard time trusting people. In fact, he had told her on numerous occasions that he only trusted her. Scully didn't need William any more - not now that she had Mulder. He was like a old, worn teddy bear that she clung to when she was afraid or lonely, but now, she could call Mulder, or tell herself to calm down because she would see Mulder soon. So, she didn't have to rely on her memories of William. He was a lovely part of her past that she would always treasure, but nothing more than that. the little voice inside her asked. she answered. Sure, she had believed, at the time, that she and William *would* meet again, but as the years passed, she realized that they wouldn't. That perhaps, they weren't supposed to. Perhaps she and William found each other on that night because they needed to - because they could draw strength from each other. As Scully turned back to the screen, she sighed, and hoped that William had found happiness. * * * J. Edgar Hoover Building X-Files Office 8:15 am Scully looked up just in time to see Mulder skid through the open office door, eyes wild, breathing heavily, a strange smile on his face. She watched him for a few moments, as a small smile crept across her face, wondering when he was going to say something. Mulder just stood there staring at her. He was totally awestruck and speechless. He couldn't believe that the woman he had worked next to - worked side by side with - for over four years was the same woman who haunted his fantasies. The same woman he had pledged his love to eleven years ago had sat across the room from him for so long, and he had never even noticed. Mulder had unconsciously held `Katherine' in such high esteem that he wasn't able to recognize her in the woman she really was: Special Agent Dana *Katherine* Scully, MD. He felt awful for doing so - as though he had somehow insulted Scully. As Mulder looked at her, he realized that she *was* the most beautiful woman he had ever seen - had grown more beautiful as the years passed. Finally, Scully couldn't take him staring at her any longer. She coughed politely, hoping to rouse him from his reverie, and said, "Mulder? Is everything all right?" Mulder blinked twice and nodded, letting a warm smile spread across his face. He let his briefcase slip to the floor, and walked towards her, not sure he would be able to stop himself from kissing her. Kneeling before her, he took her hand in his, and looked up at her affectionately. "Everything's fine," he said, finally speaking. Scully looked from his curious expression to their joined hands. "Mulder, what's going on?" He reached up and touched her cheek tenderly, feeling that familiar burn - that chemistry that they always had. "Nothing. I just wanted to say good morning to you...*Katherine*." That said, he sat back on his heels and waited for her reaction. She nodded, but then stopped. "Mulder, why in the world did you call me Katherine? Only two people..." she trailed off, then, as she caught the look in his eyes. His eyes looked so young, then. So innocent and pure...unaware of all the terrible things that he had to endure. They looked like... She leaned closer to him, her heartbeat suddenly double what it had been. She studied Mulder's face and eyes meticulously - a strange feeling urging her to do so. And then she saw it. Scully gasped and her hand flew to cover her mouth, her eyes wide. As she did, Mulder smiled, knowing that she knew. "It can't be..." said Scully. Mulder just smiled at her. "Is it...can it be...William?" Mulder nodded. "None other." And then a huge smile broke across Scully's face, and she was suddenly in Mulder's arms, half-crying half-laughing, wanting to kiss him desperately. After a long time, they pulled apart and looked at each other - disbelief in their eyes. Mulder reached up to run his fingers through her hair, while Scully touched his cheek, his eyelids, his lips, wanting to memorize every feature. "I can't believe it's really you," she said softly, hugging him tightly, her head on his shoulder. "Believe it," he answered. "It looks like my mother was right," he said enigmatically. At her curious expression, he waved his hand dismissively, saying he would tell her later. "Besides, I'm the one who's in shock. I thought I'd never see `Katherine' again, and it turns out she was right. She said we'd meet again - and we did. Only she never said I'd get to know the most amazing woman I've ever met...you." She looked up at him gently. "Now I get the best of both worlds." He cocked his head to one side. "What do you mean?" "I get William *and* Mulder. What more could a girl want?" Mulder smiled softly, and touched her cheek. "But you forgot someone." Scully cocked her head to the left. "Who?" "If you want him, you also get Fox." Scully looked at him for a long time, the love she felt for *Mulder* mixing with the love she had felt for *William*, and did not speak. Finally, she said, "There's no one I want more than Fox." Mulder chuckled, and leaned in to kiss her, unable to wait one moment longer. And when they kissed, it was as if they were transported back in time - as if they had never been apart. Their bodies melded into one, and they were free. Free from all of the loneliness, the nightmares, the fear, the plots. Free from everything. William and Katherine had finally come home. THE END