From: RaValliano@aol.com Date: Sat, 5 Sep 1998 21:35:21 EDT Subject: Eleventh Hour (7a/11) by Rachel Anton Title: Eleventh Hour (7a/11) Author: Rachel Anton E-Mail: RaValliano@aol.com Rating: NC-17 See part one for summary, disclaimer, etc. Scully could hardly believe it when they finally made it back to her apartment and Mulder didn't try to flee again. She was not used to this. Not at all. Every guy she'd ever been involved with had pressured her to do this. She had never even kissed a man without him expecting, sometimes demanding, more. She had never been in a situation like this in her life. She had thrown herself at Mulder in a way she'd never thought herself capable of. She wanted him more than she'd ever considered it possible to want anything. And he had fought her every step of the way. Getting him to her bed had been like pulling teeth. She was trying not to take it personally. He really did seem to want her back. But for some reason which she could not fathom, he didn't seem to think himself worthy of her. He didn't seem to understand how she could possibly love him. It was frustrating and infuriating and very, very sad. Now that he was here, lying in her bed next to her, she vowed to show him once and for all that she could, and in fact did, love him more than life itself. He touched and kissed her with a tenderness that made her ache inside as they lay together. She'd never been handled with such care, such gentleness. She'd never felt so comfortable and at ease making out with a guy. She'd also never been so turned on in her life. The light kisses he was planting on her lips, her face, her neck, were driving her absolutely crazy. She wanted more. She felt a little reluctant about pushing though. She didn't want him to think she was some kind of sex-starved lunatic. She'd already attacked him twice. But if he didn't get naked soon she was sure she would die. His hands were stroking her sides lightly and she took one of them in her own and led it to her breast, feeling self-conscious but needing the touch too badly to stop. They both moaned as he ran his fingers over her hardened nipple through her shirt and she threw her head back, thrusting her chest at him. He seemed to take the hint for a change and brought both his hands to her breasts. He ran his thumbs over her nipples with increasing pressure as he licked and nipped at her throat and she threw her leg over his hip, pulling his lower body closer to hers. Finally, his hands moved down and started tugging at the bottom of her shirt. He pulled his head back and looked at her. He was bright red and breathing as heavily as she was. Yeah, he wanted her back all right. "Scully if...if you wanna stop, I mean any time, let me know okay?" Stop? Right. "Don't stop Mulder. Please don't stop." She lifted her arms encouragingly and he pulled the tank top off her. He gazed at her for a moment and she started pulling at his shirt. "You too." He smiled and tossed his T-shirt to the floor. God he was beautiful. His upper body was amazing. Perfect. Large, powerful arms, muscular but not to the point of obscenity. A hard, well defined chest with just the right amount of hair. Solid abs. Inny belly button. She wanted to touch everything. She wanted to lick him everywhere. She ran her hands possessively over his flesh, wanting to stake a claim. He shivered at the needy way she touched him. Her eyes drifted lower, to the bulge in his jeans. She wanted to touch that too. She ran her fingers lightly over him and he shut his eyes and groaned. It was such an amazing sound, so awe-inspiring to think that she could create such a sound in him. She buried her face in his chest, tasting the heat of his skin, and started unbuttoning the top of his jeans. His hands clasped around her wrists tightly and she looked up, startled. He pulled her hands away from him and placed them on the pillow next to her head. "Not yet baby, not yet," he mumbled. Baby. He called her baby. She almost felt faint hearing his gravely, soft voice calling her that. She lay flat on her back and he leaned over her kissing and stroking her arms and her neck. He ran his tongue down her neck and traced the line of her bra until his face was buried in her cleavage. He made a muffled grunting sound and she giggled. Then he licked her nipple through the silk of her bra and the giggle turned into a sigh. When the lick became a light nip, the sigh became a sharp gasp. She twined her fingers in his hair and pressed his face against her. Encouraged, he bit down hard and sucked her through the material. She moaned and her legs shifted against each other. "You like it?" he asked, looking up at her. "Mmmmyeah." "Tell me if I do anything you don't like okay?" She nodded enthusiastically, just wanting him to get back to what he'd been doing. He reached between them to undo the clasp between her breasts and she noticed that his hands were trembling. He could barely get a grip on the tiny piece of plastic. He grinned at her sheepishly and she smiled. He was scared. That made her feel even more at ease for some reason. She was safe here. And wanted. He finally managed to undo the clasp and he pulled back the bra. She slipped out of the straps and tossed it to the side. She lay completely bared to him. With the lights on. She didn't think anyone had ever seen her like this. Guys had felt her up before but always in the dark, usually in a car. No man had ever stared openly at her breasts the way Mulder was doing now. She felt a blush creeping into her skin under his eyes. She wondered how many breasts he had seen, if hers were okay. "Scully, you are so beautiful." She looked into his eyes and saw that they were starting to get watery. He was crying. Before she could think about what that might possibly mean his mouth was covering her nipple again and she convulsed against him. He pulled her into his mouth and suckled and licked at her with his incredible lips and his strong tongue and she felt a strange burning sensation through her whole body. She felt like her whole body was on fire. She pulled at him and he rolled over on top of her. She spread her legs and took him between them. They were both still in jeans but she could feel the hardness of him pressing against her and it made her whimper. He caught her mouth in a scorching kiss that made her feel even weaker and she pressed herself tightly against him. He was so big, his body covered her completely. She felt engulfed by him, overwhelmed by his bulk, his smell, his Mulderness. He ground his hips down into her and filled her mouth with his tongue. He was everywhere and it felt so damned good. She couldn't even believe it. This was usually the point where she became utterly terrified and told the guy it was time to go home. But she didn't want Mulder to go home. She thought if he even tried to leave now she would die. But he didn't. He kept grinding against her and thrusting his tongue in and out of her mouth and moaning that beautiful moan. She grabbed his ass and pulled him harder to her, increasing the pressure. She felt a throbbing between her legs that she recognized vaguely. She'd been able to bring herself to this point a couple of times but never beyond. It was a wonderful but frustrating place to be which is why she'd essentially given up on masturbation a long time ago. He moved his kiss from her mouth down to her chin, over her neck and finally back to her breast. He ran his tongue in slow, agonizing circles over her nipples and she rocked against him. She thought he would stop there but he continued his downward path, licking his way down her stomach, over her belly button and her sides. It would have tickled if she hadn't been so aroused. She felt his hands at the waist of her jeans and looked down nervously. She wanted this so much, she was so ready for it, but it was still uncharted territory. "Can I take these off Scully?" God he was so sweet, so considerate, asking her permission for every little baby step they took. It made her heart soar and her fear vanish. She nodded and smiled. "Please." She kicked off her shoes and socks and he slowly unbuttoned her jeans. When she felt his fingers pulling her fly down, brushing against her, she felt a strange, but very pleasant tremor and arched against his hand. He smiled and pulled the jeans down her legs and off her body. He sat back on his knees and looked at her with that same goofy grin. But beneath that grin his eyes burned with a raw, open hunger that took her breath away. He really did think she was beautiful. He stood up at the foot of the bed and finished unbuttoning the fly she had started with before. He didn't seem to want her to touch him there for some reason. Not yet anyway. That's what he'd said. Not yet baby. She tingled again thinking of the intimate way he had said that. She watched with rapt fascination as he pulled his jeans off and threw them on the floor. He stood before her clad only in a pair of blue cotton boxers. She could see the outline of his erection pressing against the fabric. She hoped he would take the boxers off too. She had an unusually strong desire to see what was underneath. But he didn't. He sank to his knees and took her foot in his hands. Her eyes widened in surprise. This wasn't exactly what she had been expecting. But as he massaged the sole of her foot, kneading the flesh with his fingers, she started to forget what she had been expecting and enjoy what he actually was doing. It felt amazing. He wrapped his lips around her big toe and sucked lightly on it and she cried out. It was surprisingly exciting. He worked his way around her whole foot, licking and massaging her toes and her ankle and she found herself clutching the blanket underneath her. Eventually he worked his way up her calf, giving it the same treatment. He tugged gently at both her legs and she went completely limp, letting him pull her towards him so that she was sitting at the edge of the bed. So that her legs were hanging down on either side of him. So that her crotch was inches from his face. Waves of panic and desire washed over her as she realized what he was going to do. "Can I kiss you here?" His mouth was so close to her that when he spoke, his words vibrated against the sodden fabric of her panties causing a whole new set of tremors through her. "Huummm..." She wished he'd stop asking now. She couldn't even form coherent words anymore. So she slid down further and jerked into his face as an answer. He chuckled against her and then ran his tongue over the material of her panties. It felt amazing. God it felt too good. She almost couldn't stand it. But still she wanted more. "Take...off. Mmmm takethemofff!" He looped his fingers through the waistband and slowly pulled the underwear down and off. And then he was there. Everywhere. His lips and his tongue and his hands, on her, in her, in places no one, not even she herself, had ever been. And it felt better than she ever imagined possible. He separated and stroked her folds gently with his fingers, lapping at her clit like a kitten, over and over and over. Back and forth, gently at first but slowly increasing in speed and pressure. Then in circles, wide at first then smaller and more focused. She grabbed the back of his head, pressing him harder against her, grabbing fistfuls of hair in a needy desperation that she had never, ever felt. Her hips began to rotate off the bed without her even realizing it. She realized suddenly that there was blood in her mouth. She'd been biting the inside of her lip to keep from making any embarrassing noises. But it was okay, she told herself. She was with Mulder and it was okay. He wouldn't think she was bad for enjoying this. He was doing it so that she would enjoy it, so that she would feel good. All for her, he was doing it all for her. God she loved him. She let herself groan a little and soon she was making an almost continual stream of noises, each louder and stranger than the last. She'd never made such noises. She hoped Rebecca wasn't home. She looked down at him and was surprised to find him looking right back at her, his eyes twinkling with mischief and desire and she wondered what she must look like, thrashing around on her bed like that. He seemed to like it though. He seemed happy. She was starting to feel something building inside her. Something that defied description. She wondered if it was an orgasm, or at least the beginnings of one. She was already way past anywhere she'd ever been and had no way of knowing if it was actually happening. They were only supposed to last a few seconds though and this was just going on and on. A sudden spasm hit her and she called out to Mulder. Was that it? Was that an orgasm? No, it couldn't be because she still wanted more. He pulled his mouth from her and she whimpered in dismay. "Have you ever been this close before Scully?" "I...mmm....noooo." She was gasping for air, barely able to think or speak. What the hell was happening to her? "Just relax Scully. Let it happen. I'm right here." He pressed his tongue against her again and she felt it more acutely than before. She felt it everywhere. He was doing it even harder and faster and her whole body was shaking. His finger began sliding slowly in and out of her and it felt surprisingly good. Amazing. She felt full. She felt herself tighten around him and pull him deeper inside. "M..moremuldermore..." He pumped her now, fast and furious and his lips tightened around her clit and he sucked at it and flicked his tongue over it again and again and again. "Mulder. Oh. Oh...GOD." She screamed. She screamed loud and long as everything inside her shattered into a million pieces. It was unbearable pleasure and sweet pain and scary and beautiful and just defied description. And then it was too much. It just hurt and she pulled his hair to make him stop. He looked up at her with a smile and crawled back up her trembling, twitching body. He covered her again and she kissed him savagely, tasting herself mingled with his taste. They moved together back to the head of the bed and he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tightly to him. "Did you like that Scully?" It was such a ridiculous question that she had to laugh. Like it? That was like asking someone if they'd "like" to meet God. Like was not the right word. "It was...oh God Mulder..thank you. Thank you." He laughed and kissed the top of her head. "Thank you Scully. Thank you for letting me give you that." Well, that was something, but it wasn't enough. Not for him. She wanted to give him everything he'd given her. She wanted to make him feel what she had just felt. She wanted his orgasm. end part 7a Eleventh Hour (7b/11) She was amazing. She was a dream. She was his. He could see it in the rapt way she was gazing up at him, feel it in the way she squeezed him close, ground her hips against his leg. He'd given her her first orgasm. He felt what he realized to be a totally inappropriate burst of male pride at the thought. The way he'd made her feel, it was unbelievable. She'd been so out of control, so ecstatic, it was the most beautiful, deeply moving thing he had ever seen. He didn't think he would ever forget that dirty, sweet smile on her face, the way her eyes had rolled into the back of her head, the satisfied and somewhat startled mewling sounds she'd been making. For a moment he was so lost in his musings that he didn't notice the fact that she was running her hands down his chest, over his stomach. When he felt her tiny fingers pulling at the waistband of his boxers he was actually startled. He'd been hard the entire time he'd been going down on her but he'd really scarcely noticed. He'd been so focused on giving her what she needed that he hadn't thought for a second about his own intense arousal. He was still hard. But still unable to conceive of asking anything of her. He would have been content to lay with her until she fell asleep and then slip off to the bathroom to relieve himself later. She seemed to want more. She was up on her knees now, pulling at the annoying garment with a look of frustration. He rose a little bit and helped her off with the shorts. And then there they were, both completely naked. It was something he'd never thought he would live to see. He looked up at her face, expecting to see her smiling back at him, but her eyes were downcast, focusing on the part of him she had never seen. Her mouth was parted in a little o and her eyes were wide with...something. Surprise, shock, dismay? "Scully?" She looked up and he saw that she was blushing. She laughed a little nervously. "I..I'm sorry. It's just...God Mulder, it's just..." She was silent for a moment and a thousand horrific possibilities ran through his head. "It's just um...it's really big Mulder." Now it was his turn to blush. He didn't really know what to say to that. "Is...is that okay Scully? I mean, does that bother you?" She laughed again and shook her head. "No, I mean, I don't think so...I mean...I like it Mulder. It's very um...it's very you. I just haven't really seen that many ya know. It kinda um...took me by surprise." He smiled, hoping that she would never have occasion to see another one. Ever. She lay back down next to him and he rolled onto his side, wanting to feel his flesh against hers. When she started kissing him, he realized that had been a mistake. His cock was already twitching anxiously against her stomach and he had to fight an overwhelming urge to start rubbing himself against her like a dog. She reached between them and stroked him lightly and he jerked into her hand reflexively with a grunt. She chuckled into his neck and wrapped her hand completely around him. He closed his eyes and let himself enjoy the sensations for a while. Her hand running up and down the length of him, her lips and tongue massaging his neck, his chest, the feel of her hair in his hands, the smell of her sweet little body beside him, it was all beautiful. "Mulder, I've never done this before. Let me know if I do it wrong." "Hmm..." He wondered what the heck she was talking about. She had just told him that a hand job was the one thing she HAD done. And she was doing it fine, just right in fact. Then before he knew what was happening, he felt her tongue flicking lightly, tentatively, over the head of his penis. "Oh God. Scully...you don't have to ahhhh...Jesus." His head fell back into the pillow as she wrapped her lips completely around the tip of him. It looked like he didn't have much choice in the matter. She was going to do it no matter what. She wanted to. And he couldn't stop her. He didn't have the strength anymore. He looked down and found her nervous eyes looking back up at him. Her mouth curled into a tiny smile around him and she slid down, slowly taking more of him in. It felt so good already. His whole body was shaking. He had to restrain himself from jerking violently into her mouth. Soon her head started bobbing slowly up and down on him. She couldn't manage to get the whole thing down so she wrapped her hand around him at the root and started moving it in synch with her mouth. It was already the best blow job he'd ever gotten in his entire life. And it wasn't just because it was Scully. True that was certainly part of it but there was more. Despite her inexperience she seemed to sense exactly what he needed. She knew how to touch him almost instinctually. He was close already. He reached down and stroked her hair lightly, needing to touch her somehow. She was still in those pigtails. He took one of them in his hand and found himself winding it around his fist like a rope. His other hand was clutching at the bedsheets for dear life. She sped her movements a bit and he groaned his approval. Suddenly he felt something hot and wet against his leg. He looked down and saw that she had straddled his thigh and was grinding herself against him as she sucked the life out of him. He groaned again and pushed his leg upwards a little. What a horny little thing she was. What a lucky son of a bitch he was. He felt himself starting to throb inside her mouth and wondered if he was starting to choke her. If so, she didn't seem to mind. She started stroking him with her tongue as she moved over him and he gasped. "Scuh..leee..." She paused and looked up at him. She took her mouth away from him and he felt like crying. "I...is this okay Mulder? Am I doing it right?" God. She was so adorable. He felt his heart shatter all over again. She just broke him sometimes. He nodded enthusiastically. "Just right, baby. Just right." She smiled and placed a delicate kiss at the crevice where the head met the shaft and he felt a tear run down his cheek. Could he love her anymore? Then she circled the head with her tongue and he was so startled at the feeling that he jerked off the bed and into her mouth. Dammit, he cursed himself. He'd been trying so hard not to do that. Strangely though, she didn't seem to mind. In fact, she smiled even wider and then she took him in. All the way in. She pulled her hand away and covered every inch of him with her mouth. It was heaven. It was the best thing he had ever felt in his entire life. But it wasn't right. She had to be choking, gagging on him by now. He tried to tell her she didn't have to, that he was sorry for jerking into her that way, that what she'd been doing before was fine, wonderful, earth shattering, but all that he was able to come up with was "Nuhhummm". She made a sound around him. Something like "Yuhhummm." He supposed it was as close to a conversation that they could get at that point. She looked happy. She really did. And she wasn't making any wretching noises even though he could feel himself sliding in and out of her throat. She reached under with her now free hand and started lightly stroking his balls. He made a high pitched squeaking sound and she stopped again. "Is this okay? Am I hurting you?" He shook his head frantically back and forth. "S'good. Donstopdonstop." She went back to exactly what she had been doing and he groaned her name. She moaned and he felt it vibrating around him. He was really, really close. He could almost hear the throbbing in his cock. He felt it everywhere. When he closed his eyes he saw stars, lights pulsing in time with the pounding in his groin. His toes curled up in the blanket and he squeezed on that braid like a life line. She sped up even more and tightened her big, perfect, blow job lips around him and everything inside him surged. He had to tell her. She needed to get out of the way. He was seconds away and she probably didn't even realize it. "Scu....Scu....uhh." She didn't seem to understand. Go figure. "Mmmm...gonna come...Scu...uh." That was a little better. But she still wasn't moving. Why wasn't she moving? He bit the inside of his lip to keep from exploding into her mouth. Did she realize what was going to happen? Could she possibly want that? He tried again to communicate some kind of warning. "Might...wanna....m...m....move." She laughed through her nose and rolled her eyes and he realized, she wanted it. She wanted him to come in her mouth. The realization was too much for him. "God, Scully...NOW!" he bellowed in a last ditch attempt. But she stayed with him as his body rose off the bed and he thrust uncontrollably into her mouth and pulled the bedsheets out and practically pulled her hair out. She stayed with him and she let every last drop of his semen shoot down her throat. When the final spasm was through she slipped his still partially erect sex out of her mouth and came to rest beside him. He pulled her to him and wrapped his arms possessively around her. He was still shaking. She wrapped her leg over his hip and he felt her heat again. He was probably covered in her juices by now. Not that he was bothered. He was starting to wonder if maybe she could bottle them for him. "So, um, was that okay?" He looked down at her in disbelief. She seemed to honestly not know. "Scully...Scully...God." He laughed. It was funny. She was so innocent and so...not. It was completely Scully. "God *damn* Scully. Are you sure you haven't done that before?" "I think I'd remember that Mulder." "It was...it was amazing Scully. Beyond words. Beyond anything. I can't even...God." He squeezed her tight and she ran her hand over his chest. "You um, you didn't have to swallow it ya know." She shook her head and chuckled. "I know that Mulder. I wanted to. I liked it. It tasted good." He smiled and pulled the rubberband from the bottom of one of her braids. For some reason they didn't seem appropriate anymore. "I liked it too Scully. I liked it a lot. It made me feel really good," he murmured as he ran his fingers through her hair, freeing it. Soon he'd undone both pigtails and spread her hair out around her face and over his chest. "You're so beautiful Scully. You know that don't you?" She shrugged. He got the impression that it wasn't something she'd ever even considered. She wasn't "the pretty one". She was the smart one or the athletic one or the shy one. Never the pretty one. But to him, she was the only one. Smartest, prettiest, strongest, no one else even compared. He wished he could show her herself through his eyes somehow. It was something he'd always wanted. He knew Scully wasn't insecure. Now or ever. But he also sensed that she didn't recognize her beauty. Especially this younger, less seasoned version of her. She seemed to think it odd that he would even suggest such a thing. "Well, you are. You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen Scully. Trust me." He lifted her chin and forced her to look at him and she smiled and nodded. "I do trust you Mulder. I do." She really did. She trusted him so openly and so willingly it was frightening. He felt even more protective towards her than he had towards her older incarnation. She seemed so vulnerable sometimes, it broke his heart. He kissed her gently and she moaned and rubbed herself against his hip. He grinned to himself. He'd created a monster. He ran his hand through her hair and over her side, down the deep curve of her waist and over the round softness of her hip. He reached around to clutch the warm pillow of her backside. She really did have the most amazing body he'd ever seen, plastic or real. Strong and lean but curvy and soft in all the right places. She had a perfect hourglass shape even if it was in miniature. She was like a little angel. And a little sex kitten. A sex angel? If there was such a thing, she was one. He turned on his side and reached between them to stroke her between her legs. She seemed to be crying out for it. She moaned happily and gave him that smile that was starting to make him weak in the knees now that he knew exactly what it meant. "That feel good?" "Mmmyeah. Do it more." He ran his fingers back and forth over her and she arched into his hand with a groan. She seemed to like it a lot. He wondered why she had never done it to herself. Or if she had, why she'd never been able to bring herself to orgasm. He supposed it had something to do with her Catholic upbringing. Good religious girls weren't supposed to do things like that. It might not have kept her from trying but the guilt might have been enough to keep her from enjoying it. He was thrilled all over again that he'd managed to free her from that with him. He wondered if he could give her an even more valuable gift. "Scully, why don't you try to do it?" Her eyes shot open and the smile disappeared. "What? You don't want to?" "Oh, no Scully. It's not that. Believe me, it's not that. I just think it might be nice for you to be able to do it for yourself once in awhile. You're a very passionate woman Scully. It might be good for you to look inside yourself and learn how to make yourself feel good." He hoped he didn't sound too much like Doctor Ruth. She looked positively panicked. "You...you want me to do it in front of you?" Honestly, he hadn't even thought about that aspect of it. But God, it was certainly something to think about. "I would love it Scully. Mmmm, it would really turn me on." He massaged her clit delicately for emphasis and she cried out. Maybe if she realized that he was getting pleasure out of it, she wouldn't feel so guilty. "Oh..Mulder. I dunno...it would turn you on? Really?" She was blushing and chewing on her lower lip. It was the cutest thing he'd ever seen. "God Scully, I can't think of anything that would turn me on more." She whimpered. He took one of her hands in his free one and led it downwards. He placed it over the hand that was touching her. She rolled onto her back and pressed down on his hand, moaning. She was smiling again. Her fingers covered his and since he wasn't moving, she began directing them, leading him, touching herself through him. "That's good Scully. You show me what to do." He paid careful attention as she led his fingers through her folds and over her clit. He memorized each motion so that he would know how to repeat it. He leaned on his elbow and watched her, mesmerized. Her eyes were closed in concentration and her mouth was partly open. She was breathing in tiny little pants and sighs and her face was covered in a thin sheen of sweat. Her hair was hanging down, partially covering her breasts, flowing over the pillow. She was the most stunning vision he had ever seen. She was so young but, he realized in that moment, she was far older than even he was. Her soul, she was an old soul. She was far more mature than he would ever be and even now she was the strong one. She'd been the one with the guts to tell him how she felt. She'd been the one to kiss him, to touch him. She'd broken down the barriers between them with such a carefree, sweet spirit, he could scarcely breath to think of it. Her youth of body had given her the innocence to make the first move without worrying about old scars, baggage, past hurts and mistakes. And her strength of soul had allowed her to do it without the paralyzing fear that gripped him constantly. She was young and she was old. He was just a fool. Even now she was saving him. She always would. All he could do was try to show her how to do the same thing for herself. And right now, this was the best he could do. She started trembling and gasping under him and he realized she was close again. She came even faster than he did. He slipped his hand out from under her so that it was only her hand touching herself. She stopped moving and looked at him imploringly. "M...Mulder?" "Go ahead baby. Finish it for me." "I...I can't." "Yes you can. Just pretend it's still my hand. Trust me Scully." He ran his hand over her forehead and placed a light kiss on her lips. "Mulder...I...you too." She nodded in the direction of his nether regions. He was surprised to look down and find himself fully erect again. What had it been, five minutes? The benefits of youth he supposed. And the benefits of Scully. So she wanted him to join her. Scully and her gender equality. Either that or she figured he would be embarrassed and drop the whole thing. Not likely at this point. He reached down and took his cock in his hand. She gasped, surprised but, he sensed, at least a little excited. He started sliding his hand over himself in a familiar rhythm and slowly but surely, her little hands started working on herself. He watched her middle finger working slow circles over her clit, then down to her entrance for more moisture which she spread over herself with a shudder. She was biting her lip still, trying to keep quiet it looked like. He increased the speed of his own motions and groaned loudly, hoping to encourage her, to show her it was okay to be liking this. Their eyes met and she smiled. "How does it feel Scully?" "Humm...good...I think. It's...a lot..." She pulled her hand away suddenly. "I think...I think I'm gonna come Mulder." He caressed her face with his free hand and kissed her shoulder. "It's okay Scully. Let it happen. Let it go." He ran his fingers over her cheek and her lips. He was surprised to feel her suck his index finger between her lips and into her mouth. She ran her tongue over it and he gasped and jerked himself harder. Her hand moved back between her legs and she seemed to only touch herself once before crying out and thrusting against her fingers. He felt her teeth around his finger and her nails digging into his arm and it was just enough. He gripped himself tightly as cum shot out of him and splattered on both of them. He called her name, as always. When he turned back to her, he was alarmed to see tears trailing down her cheek. She was crying. Yet again. He should have known. It was too much. He was the stupidest man that ever lived. He pulled her to him and wrapped his arms around her. "What is it Scully? Are you okay?" She nodded but he heard her muffled crying against his chest. He felt her tears burning down his skin. "Sweetheart, what is it? I'm sorry. Was that really bad?" She looked up at him and shook her head. "No. No Mulder, it was...God I don't know what it was." "Are you upset?" "No I think....I think I'm happy. I'm sorry Mulder. It was just really intense." He kissed the top of her head and pulled her close. It was okay. She was okay. She was trembling in his arms but she'd stopped crying. They were okay. "Mulder, it was really good. I mean, I'm glad we did that. I mean...wow." She laughed into his chest and he laughed too. He pulled the blanket up to cover them both and she snuggled into him. "Can we do all that again soon Mulder?" "Anytime Scully. Anytime." She sighed and stretched her arms and legs out over him. Her hair spilled over his chest. He felt enveloped in her head to toe. Body and soul. She loved him. She was his. If only he could tell her how he felt. If only he could communicate the depth of his feelings to her. But he couldn't. Not until she knew the whole truth. He realized he couldn't continue this way for much longer. She wanted him to make love to her, to take her virginity. That's how much she trusted him. He needed to make himself worthy of that trust. He couldn't take her virginity, couldn't tell him he loved her, until she knew everything about how he had come to be in her life. He had to tell her. And soon. end part 7b Eleventh Hour (8/11) August 12, 1982 I've never felt time as an oppressive force before. All my life I've wished for it to hurry up already. I've waited for the months and years to pass so that I could be the person I needed to be. Independent, alone, free from the restrictions of youth and my parents and high school and everything else. Now I feel an almost claustrophobic sense of dread with every day that passes. Every hour. Every minute that goes by is another minute closer to the minute Mulder will get on that plane to England. We haven't discussed it. Not since that first night. He told me the date. September 3rd. He has his ticket. He has his class schedule. That's all I know. I'm not sure if denial or fear has kept us from talking about what exactly is going to happen when he steps on that plane. Will he write, call, visit? Will he stay faithful to me? I want to ask him these things but I think that I am afraid of the answers. I am afraid of what I will do, how I will feel if he tells me no. I have a secret hope that he will tell me at the last minute that he's changed his mind, he can't go anywhere without me. I want to ask him if he would ever consider staying here with me, going to the University instead, but again, I am afraid of the answer. I'm not sure if these unspoken questions are what have kept him from taking me completely. Something is holding him back, keeping him from breaking that final barrier. I am happy with what we do. He satisfies me in ways I never dreamt imaginable. He's taught me how to love my body and to give and take pleasure in limitless ways. But still I ache for more. I ache for him inside me. I need for him to be the one and I am afraid we are running out of time. How's that for melodrama? It's the truth though. I can't imagine giving myself to another man in that way. I can't imagine ever wanting that. I want Mulder to be the one, the only. I sense that he wants that too. I sense that he loves me as I love him. He still hasn't said those words, though he shows me every day. He is haunted. My deepest fear is that he is holding back because he knows he will be leaving me soon, that he doesn't want to take my virginity and run. I want to tell him that I don't care. I need him to do it even if I never see him again. But that would mean talking about the fact that he is leaving which, as I said, we never ever do. Scully sighed and dropped her pen on the living room table. She couldn't even write about it. She felt tears welling in her eyes already. How could life possibly be so unfair? She was trying to enjoy every minute she had with Mulder and not think about the future at all, but the future was rapidly becoming the present. And she didn't know what she would ever do without him. No one else could ever compare, even as a friend. Nothing in the world would fill the empty void that he would leave in her life. Her heart would be hollow without him there. Her musings were interrupted by a knock on the door. She looked at her watch. It was almost midnight. It had to be either one of Rebecca's many "gentleman callers" or Mulder. She looked down at her sweats and felt the messy bun piled onto her head and almost hoped it was one of Rebecca's jerks. She wiped the annoying tears from her eyes and walked to the door. She looked through the peephole and of course, it was Mulder. He never seemed to drop by unexpectedly when she was lounging around in a sexy silk robe or something. Not that she did that very often. She opened the door to find him tapping his foot nervously and running his fingers through his hair. "Mulder, I wasn't expecting you till tomorrow." He grinned sheepishly and shrugged. "Sorry." "No, it's okay. I was...I was just thinking about you. Come on in." "Actually, I was hoping you'd come out." He was speaking very quickly and didn't seem to even want to step through the doorway. "Come out? I don't..." she gestured towards her sloppy attire. "You look gorgeous. Just throw on some shoes and let's go." He was acting very odd. He wasn't usually this impatient or bossy but for some reason she couldn't refuse. She pulled on some sneakers and followed him to his car. She had to run to keep up. Once she was sitting in the passenger seat she glanced towards the back. There were some blankets there and a grocery bag. "Mulder, where are we going?" "Just a place," he waved his hand in the air and started the engine. He seemed extremely tense. He hadn't even kissed her hello or anything. He was in a damn hurry for some reason. A place? What the hell did that mean? "What's in the bag Mulder?" "Just some stuff." He pulled the car onto the road and she looked at him curiously. Something very odd was going on here. But she didn't even really care all that much. She was with Mulder. It was all that really mattered. xxxxx Mulder had only the vaguest notion of where they were going. They were going to the ocean. Scully loved the ocean. That was about as far as his knowledge went. He hoped the water freed her spirit enough to make her believe. He got on the highway and headed East, towards Delaware, towards the Atlantic. He hadn't planned on doing it this way. He'd planned on doing it at the Vineyard. But his mother had been there all the time, butting in and giving Scully weird looks. He'd planned on doing it once they got back. But the time never seemed right. He'd never had the guts. But for some reason when he'd been about to go to sleep, he'd decided tonight was it. It had to be tonight. It was time to tell her everything. He'd thrown together a makeshift picnic and bolted out the door before he lost the nerve again. He hoped they got wherever they were going before the sun came up. He had to do this at night. They sped through the darkness in silence for almost an hour. She seemed to sense that he had something to get off his chest, some purpose for this madness, but she was waiting for him to start talking. He loved her for it. She looked so beautiful tonight. He loved seeing her like this, natural and unadorned. He prayed that she would believe him. Or at least understand, still love him. If she stopped loving him he was sure he would die. "Mulder, are we almost to the place yet?" Her voice startled him. He jumped. He couldn't remember being this nervous in his life. "Um...yeah, sure." "Mulder, you don't even know where we're going do you? We're just driving around randomly in the middle of the night aren't we?" He looked over and saw that she was smirking. "Would that bother you Scully?" "Not really but you could tell me that. You don't have to pretend to know where you're going Mulder." He smiled because the whole thing was a miniature version of what he'd been doing since he'd been back here. Driving her around randomly, not knowing where they were going or if he was doing things the way he was supposed to, letting her think he knew what the hell was going on. "I'll know it when I see it Scully." He saw a sign for Delaware Bay and followed it. Once he got there he could turn South and they would eventually reach the ocean. "Well, wake me up when you find what you're looking for Mulder. I'm taking a nap." xxxxx Scully was in a dark, small place. She could barely breath, she couldn't speak, couldn't move. There was something on her mouth, over her eyes, her wrists. She was in some kind of a small enclosure, a closet maybe. And there was someone on the other side. Someone she couldn't see or hear but sensed. Someone whose very essence spoke of evil, vile things. He wanted to hurt her. He wanted to kill her. She was more frightened than she'd ever been in her life. Then suddenly there was brightness. White light slowly turning into outlines, figures, people, people coming to save her, police men, Mulder. Mulder was there. She was embarrassed. She didn't like him to see her so scared. She didn't want him to know that she was afraid to die. Then he touched her face, forced her to look at him, and she collapsed into his arms, letting herself cry, letting him see her. She let him hold her. He looked afraid to do that but he wrapped his arms around her anyway and it filled her heart. "Scully?" She woke to the feel of his hand on her shoulder. She was gasping for air. She still felt the gag. "Scully, are you okay? What is it?" "Dream. I...I dunno. Weird nightmare." He leaned over and hugged her for comfort and she realized that the car had stopped. They were there, wherever there was. "What about Scully?" She pulled reluctantly out of his embrace and looked around. They were in a dark, deserted parking lot. She heard waves. "Mulder, where are we?" "Assatteague Island." "Assawhat?" "It's an island. Off the coast of Delaware." "Looks more like a ghost town. Why are we here Mulder?" He shrugged and opened his door. "Let's go find out." He pulled the stuff from the back seat and hopped out of the car. "Come on," he called as he started heading quickly away. She followed him down to the beach. It was a beautiful night, clear and warm. They walked down to the shore and she took off her shoes to feel the water on her feet. The place was deserted and peaceful. Mulder certainly knew how to pick a romantic getaway. She had a surge of excitement. Maybe he'd taken her here to make love to her finally. But romance seemed far from his mind right now. Something was troubling him. "So, what was that nightmare about Scully?" She sighed, not really wanting to talk about the silly dream. She wanted to know what he had brought her here for. "Um, it was kind of odd. Stupid really. Someone was holding me captive in this closet thing. I dunno, it was really just a dumb nightmare Mulder." "What else happened?" God, what the hell? It was just a dream. She rolled her eyes impatiently and wondered again what the hell he was so nervous about. "I dunno, you came and saved me and then you hugged me and I dunno, you looked a little different, like older or something." "Oh, Scully. Oh God." He stopped walking and ran his fingers through his hair again. "What Mulder? What is it?" "That...it wasn't a dream Scully. It really happened." She was starting to get really worried about him. She was used to him acting peculiar but this was downright unsettling. "Mulder, what are you talking about?" "Over there Scully, come on." He pointed to a pile of rocks. She followed him to the huge, flat boulders that seemed to be growing out of the ocean. He led her to the top and placed the blankets down so that they could sit. The spray from the ocean hit them lightly but it was a few feet below. It was a very beautiful spot. The rock they were on jutted out over the water so all she could see in every direction was ocean and sky. And Mulder. He sat down beside her and started fussing with the things he'd brought. "Mulder, what did you mean by that, it really happened? What does that mean?" "I, I brought some peaches Scully. And um, strawberries, grapes, there's some bread and a bottle of wine..." He was laying these items out on the blanket as he described them to her. She was getting mildly frustrated. "Mulder, I don't want to eat. I want you to tell me what you were talking about. I want to know why you brought me here." He took a deep breath and turned to face her. He wouldn't meet her eyes. He looked like a frightened child. "Scully, I have something to tell you. Something very bizarre. You might not believe it. In fact I don't think you will. And it might make you hate me or be afraid of me but I can't keep it from you anymore. I've got to tell you now." Possibilities flashed through her mind, each more frightening than the last. He was gay. He was engaged. He was married. He found her repulsive. "Mulder, nothing could make me hate you and I know you would never lie to me but you are starting to scare me. Just tell me. It'll be okay." He took her face in his hands and finally looked in her eyes. There was so much there. So much intensity and love and raw terror in his eyes. "Do you trust me Scully? Do you believe in us?" "Of course I do." "Do you feel our connection?" "You know I do Mulder." "Do you know why you feel it?" She almost said, "Because I love you" but that wasn't really an answer. It was circular. He was asking her why. Why she had fallen so hard, so fast, so easily. And to that she had no answer. She shrugged helplessly. "I just...do Mulder." "Well, I know why you do Scully. It's because this isn't the first time we've met. I've known you for a long long time." xxxxxx Mulder took a deep breath and glanced towards the ocean. How in the world was he supposed to explain this? "Mulder, what does that mean? You've known me? I don't remember meeting you ever before." "You haven't Scully. I said that I've known you. Not that you've known me." He sighed and shook his head. This game of semantics was just going to confuse her even more. "Scully, I'm...I'm talking about the future, a future that's already happened, that I came back here to try to change." He realized how truly ridiculous the words sounded once they had filled the air between them and he wasn't surprised to see her scrunch up her face and hear her snort derisively. "What the hell are you talking about Mulder?" He bit back the overwhelming urge to make a joke, let her think he'd been kidding around with her, trying to make her think he was some kind of supernatural hero out of a sci-fi novel. But this was honesty night and he wasn't gonna back out now that he was already half way to making a fool out of himself. "Scully I...I'm from the future." He almost laughed himself at that one. "Mulder, what does that *mean*?" She wasn't even mildly amused anymore. She was probably starting to get scared that she'd been having oral sex with an escaped mental patient. Mulder shuddered, realizing that that was actually what she had been doing. "Scully, I know this sounds odd, insane even, but it's the truth. My...my brain, it's...it came back, from the future, from twenty years in the future. This...this body is mine but it's...it's not. It's me but it's not the me that my brain is from." He stopped, utterly frustrated. He couldn't even explain it to himself. How could he have expected to explain it to her? "So, you're saying that you just jumped backwards in time, into your past? Is that what you're saying Mulder?" She wasn't angry. She wasn't even really upset. She was just...Scully. Skeptical as ever but willing to listen, willing to give him a chance. "I guess...yes. That's what I'm saying Scully. I didn't intend to go back this far. Only a couple months but it was um...kind of an experiment in the first place. I didn't even expect it to work. I certainly didn't expect to meet you here and now but it happened Scully. It all happened." She was silent for a long agonizing moment. When she turned away from him he thought for sure that he had lost her. "Scully..." He took her chin in his hand and forced her to look at him. There were tears of confusion forming in her eyes. "Scully please. I know you can feel what we have. That dream you had, it was something from our future. I know you can feel the truth of what I'm saying somewhere inside of you. You have to let yourself believe it though. You have to want to believe." "Mulder..." "Scully please, please believe me. I need you to believe me." "Mulder, I need you to tell me why. I need you to tell me why you're here." xxxxxx Scully sat quietly and she listened to him. She'd asked him to tell her the story of their "future" together more out of concern for his well being than anything else. She wanted to keep him calm, to keep him talking. She wanted to listen to him and try to figure out where this insanity was coming from. It scared her seeing him like this. She hadn't known what to expect from his story but what he told her was certainly surprising. It was a very long, intricate tale. So precise in detail that it might have taken a person years to concoct. It was a strange tale. So strange that she couldn't imagine it coming from someone's wildest imaginings. She wasn't sure what to believe anymore and part of her was certain that this was all some kind of a sick joke he was playing but as he told her more and more, she felt something resonate in her despite herself. She told herself over and over that it was crazy, that she shouldn't believe it, but somehow, something told her it was just...right. She found herself growing more and more wrapped up in his tale as he spoke. She listened with concentration and fascination. It really did sound like them and it was actually sounding like a pretty good, if somewhat unusual future. Fighting the bad guys, living an adventure, and always together. That was the best part. Mulder was her future. She did want to believe. But then things took a bit of a down turn. On and on the stories went, each more horrific than the last and she noticed that as he told her, silent tears ran down his cheeks. He was reliving these things. So many terrible things they had been through together. But through the entire ordeal, one thing had been constant. Their unwavering devotion to and faith in one another. She reached over and wiped his cheek with her hand. "Mulder, why did you come back here? What happened to me?" He turned to her, his face suddenly clouded in darkness. "Do you believe me Scully? Do you?" She did. God help her, she did. He seemed so deeply effected by what he was telling her. And she felt the truth of his words. She felt it deep in her soul. She nodded and smiled encouragingly even though her heart was full of fear. "We...we were on a case. A murder case. You...you went after the killer and you caught him but you did it all alone, you didn't have any back up and you didn't tell me where you were going because there wasn't any time and I...I was very angry. I yelled at you because I was afraid to tell you how I really felt, because I was a coward Scully...I couldn't...I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." His shoulders slumped forward and the tears flowed more profusely down his face. She stroked his hair lightly and then suddenly he fell into her, burying his face between her breasts and squeezing her so tight around the waist she could barely breathe. "Mulder, it's okay. I...I'm sure I knew." She continued stroking his hair, trying to soothe him but he was crying out loud now, hiccuping and whimpering into her chest like a little boy. "It's not okay Scully," he moaned through his choking sobs. "It's not. I left and I told you to go. I made you go and you went and he...God Scully...he..." "He who? Mulder, what happened?" "He killed you Scully!" he wailed against her and his entire body shook. "He killed you and you died and it's my fault. It was all my fault." She felt her stomach drop hearing the words. It was what she had been fearing. Died. She had died. He had come back to keep her from dying. Dead at thirty-eight. She didn't want to believe anymore. If she had any doubts though, she was now completely convinced that he was telling her the truth. He would never make something like this up, and if he had, it wouldn't be so devastating for him to talk about it. She felt the moisture from his profuse tears leaking through the heavy material of her sweatshirt already. He was sobbing over and over that it was all his fault. She needed to tell him it wasn't, couldn't have been. But she could barely speak, barely move. Dead. Dead at thirty-eight. And Mulder, she had left him alone. She had died and left him with no one, desperate enough to try this crazy thing in the first place. She swallowed back the tears she felt welling and stroked his hair again. "It wasn't your fault. Mulder, it couldn't have been. It wasn't." "It was Scully. It was. You died because of me, because I'm such a coward. Scully you died because I couldn't tell you I loved you. That's why I came back Scully. To tell you I love you so you won't die." She let herself fall into the blankets from the force of his weight on her. He fell with her and lay beside her, his head still buried in her chest. She spoke soothingly to him and continued to stroke his hair and his neck. "I knew Mulder. I'm sure I knew. It wasn't your fault. It wasn't your fault." "I'm sorry I never told you Scully. I loved you then. I love you now. I'll love you forever." "I know Mulder. I know." And she did. But it was so nice to finally hear it. She'd had no idea how long she'd been waiting. end part 8 Eleventh Hour (9/11) She believed him. She believed him and forgave him and still loved him. And she knew he loved her. She had always known. Of course. He let himself enjoy the feel of her comforting embrace for a moment. Then he realized how she must be feeling, hearing about her death like that, it had to be terrifying. He loosened his death grip on her a little bit and looked up from the comfortable warmth of her chest. Her eyes were closed and her face was wet with tears. He ran his hands over her cheeks. "Scully, don't cry Scully, don't be scared. It's okay now. I promise you, it's not gonna happen again. I'm never gonna let anything like that happen to you ever again." He knew it was a stupid promise to make. He had no idea what the future held for them now, if he'd screwed things up even more by coming back here. "Mulder...I know, it's just...I can't believe you had to go through all that. I'm so sorry Mulder." "Don't Scully. It's okay, you're okay now. That's what matters the most to me." He was starting to think maybe this had been his biggest mistake yet. She was still crying. "I'm sorry Scully. I don't think I should have told you any of this." She shook her head vehemently. "No, you should have. I'm glad that you did. Really glad. Now it's...it's ours Mulder. I can share these memories with you now Mulder, good and bad. You don't have to be alone anymore." He wondered how it was possible to keep loving her more every day of his life. She was right. This was theirs, and sharing it with her had allowed him to let her in completely, to love her fully. He kissed her with a new passion, a startling intensity which she returned in kind. He trailed his mouth over her face, down her neck, tasting the salt of her tears and the sweetness of her skin and she moaned and wrapped her leg around him. "Mulder," she whispered, "It's time. I want you to make love to me. Here. Tonight." Yes, yes it was time. It was finally time. It was finally right. He felt that with absolute certainty. He slipped his hands under her sweatshirt, exploring the warm terrain underneath. He was happy to discover that she wasn't wearing a bra. Her nipples felt hard as rocks, probably more due to the cold from the incoming tide than anything else. But as he ran his fingers over them she arched under him and sighed. She reached down and pulled the top off and he noticed that water was splashing over them. The ocean was getting closer. It made her body glisten in the moonlight. Drops of seawater collected on her breast and he leaned down to suckle them off. He wrapped his mouth over her nipple and she clutched his hair hungrily. He moved so that he was laying on top of her and she pulled his T-shirt off clumsily. He noticed that her arms were trembling. "Scully, are you sure you want this? I can wait as long as you need." "No Mulder!" Her frantic reply startled him. "I want this. No more waiting. I NEED this Mulder." She arched against him, scraping her nails down his back. "God, I need it." She needed it. Needed him. It was real. After everything he had just told him, she needed him still. He allowed himself to feel it, to believe it. He ran his hands over her body and covered her mouth in another kiss. He thought he could taste eternity. She was a woman. Not a child. He let himself see her that way for perhaps the first time since this had begun. And he gave himself permission to treat her that way, to take her like a woman. His tongue scraped the insides of her cheeks, probed the back of her throat and she sucked on it, pulling him deeper into her. She bit at his lips with her teeth and slid her hands over his bare back and down under the denim of his jeans, the cotton of his boxers. She grabbed his ass and he thrust against her in response. He ran his hands down her torso and tugged at the tie of her sweatpants. It came undone and he pulled them over her hips. Christ. She wasn't wearing any underwear either. He realized that he had probably dragged her out of the house in the clothing she was about to sleep in. He wasn't sure why that turned him on so much but there wasn't much about his hormones that he understood. He rolled to the side so that he could lay beside her and pull her pants completely off. So that he could touch her. He ran his fingers reverently over her belly and into the damp forest between her legs. She cried out as he rubbed her the way she had shown him that first night. He watched her face as he continued to touch her but his glance was averted temporarily to the pile of food he'd been inexplicably motivated to bring along with them. He remembered a fantasy he'd been given to fixating on back in the old days. Other days. Whatever it had been. Maybe his choices hadn't been as random as he'd thought. xxxxx He was asking her something. Something...what was it? She could barely make it out. Everything was fuzzy except for the exquisite feeling of his hand between her legs. Why did he have to talk at moments like this? She didn't usually mind, in fact she enjoyed his passionate ramblings, except when he actually expected her to talk back, to communicate coherently. "Hmmmwha?" "I said are you hungry Scully?" Hungry? She thought it was pretty obvious that she was hungry. For him, for this. How could he even ask? "Cause I'm kinda hungry. I was thinking about all that food I brought." All that food he brought?! Her eyes shot open in complete confusion. He was thinking about food? Now? "You must be hungry after all that huh?" He had to be kidding. What the hell was he talking about? "Mulder, I...I don't...ahhh" She lost the power of speech as two of his fingers plunged deep into her. He moved them slowly in and out as he massaged her clit with his thumb. This was more like it. Just a little more and... Then he was gone. He was reaching over her body, towards the damned food. "Mulder! Dammit!" "Don't cry sweetheart, I'll be back," he mumbled with an idiotic grin. She felt like slapping him. He picked up the bottle of wine and a corkscrew and sat up to open the stupid thing. It was a long laborious process and she was starting to really get angry. Was he just stalling? Did he not want this the way she thought he did? He was struggling to get the bloody corkscrew out and he gave her a nervous shrug. She rolled her eyes and wondered if she should just jump into the sea and end it all. Finally she heard the thing pop and he took a swig from the bottle. He held it towards her. "Have some Scully. It's great." She bit her lip to avoid screaming out loud and sat up, leaning on her elbows. He brought the bottle to her lips and turned it slightly so she could sip it. It tasted surprisingly good. Probably because every sensory organ in her body was on full alert at the moment. He pulled the bottle back and some droplets dripped down her chin like drool. He smiled and leaned down, licking the moisture from her face. She moaned at the feeling of him on her again and moved to get his tongue back in her mouth but he pulled away. He bent over her again and she watched the way the moonlight played over his chest and back. His back, she loved his back. She had a sudden image of his back looming over her body, muscles tensed with effort, his beautiful behind pumping into her in a frenzy. She groaned with frustration and he turned back to her with a carton of strawberries and that same idiotic grin. He took one out and dangled it over her mouth. "Want some Scully." She shrugged and went to bite it but he pulled it away from her. "Not like that Scully. Savor it. Little bites." She leaned back on her elbows with a sigh. Why was he toying with her this way? He brought the berry back to her mouth and ran the tip over her lower lip. She licked it in what she hoped was enough of a seductive gesture to get him back between her legs. He seemed to like it because he made a little Mulder excited sound but still he made no move for her. She took a tiny bite off the tip and chewed it. It did taste amazing. As she savored the little bit in her mouth Mulder ran the now open strawberry over her lips, covering them with the juice. Then, thank GOD, his tongue was back, licking the taste from her. She opened her mouth and he slipped inside, tasting the tiny bit of fruit she hadn't yet swallowed. He moaned quite loud and she was sure she had him now. But then he pulled back again. And he ate the rest of the strawberry in one huge bite. "What happened to savoring Mulder?" "Mmm...I just wanted to see you do that," he muttered, his mouth full. He took another one and brought it to her mouth. "You can have more of this one Scully." "Oh thanks. Thanks a lot." She smiled despite her frustration. She was starting to understand that he wasn't really stalling. He was playing with her. And it really was pretty cute. He seemed to really be excited about feeding her like this. She bit the top half off the next one and chewed it slowly as he watched with rapt fascination. He ran the open end of the uneaten half down her chin and smoothly down her neck. The juice felt sticky and cold but surprisingly good on her skin. Especially when he started licking it off. HIs tongue felt hot and wonderful against her neck and she arched her whole body towards him, hoping he would give all of her the same treatment. He ran the fruit down, over her breasts as he continued to lick and suck on her neck. When she felt the juicy coldness on her nipple she cried out from the feel of it. Then she felt his tongue there, lapping at her, and she moaned and pulled her arms out from under herself. She let herself collapse back into the blankets and he fell with her. She tangled her fingers in his hair, clutching his head to her breast in a desperate attempt to keep him there. This whole eating naked thing was cute and all but she was ready for more. He stayed with her, suckling at her breast and continuing to run the strawberry down her body. The moisture on her belly caused her to tremble. Wherever the berry went, Mulder's mouth was sure to follow. Her breast, now moist with saliva, slipped from his lips and his tongue followed the strawberry trail as she had expected. When his tongue flicked in and out of her navel she looked down. Her hips had begun to gyrate off the ground without her knowledge. He was so close... "God...Mulder, please!" But once again, he was gone. He sat back on his knees and reached for another strawberry from the carton and ran her hand over her face in frustration. Weren't women the ones who were supposed to go in for this erotic foreplay? She watched him carefully remove the stem from the new berry and noticed that his hands were trembling. Maybe she wasn't the only one getting anxious. She was shocked to feel the cold, bumpy texture of the strawberry sliding inside her. She gasped and caught his eyes. He winked at her and softly told her, "I'm still kinda hungry Scully." xxxxxx He hoped to God that she didn't think he was a crude pig for wanting to do this. It was just one of those things, one of those countless images from his old life that he could never seem to chase away. They would creep up on him at the most inconvenient and embarrassing times, in the office, in the middle of an autopsy, when they were sitting in his car, eating greasy chicken out of a bag and staking out some seedy apartment building. All of the sudden he would picture himself, eating a strawberry out of her vagina, just completely out of the blue. It didn't really qualify as a fantasy in the strict sense of the word. It wasn't something he would sit at home and jerk-off thinking about, wishing he could do. It was just something that he would see, utterly against his will. He looked down at the narrow end of the strawberry, peering out from inside her, and realized that it was in fact, one of the more beautiful things he had ever imagined. More beautiful in life even than in his mind. He moved his head between her legs and they spread wide for him, shaking as they did. He stroked her thighs soothingly as he started to suck lightly on the fruit. So juicy and sweet and a little bit tangy now as it mixed with her flavor. He took a small bite, watching her chest rise and fall erratically. He knew he was making her insane and he couldn't help but gather some satisfaction from that. Although his own self control was declining rapidly. He was enjoying the strawberry but he was consumed with the need to taste Scully, just Scully. He took another large bite then finally sucked what was left out of her and into his mouth. It was the most amazing thing he had ever tasted. He let it roll around in his mouth for a moment, savoring the stunning combination of flavors and textures. Scully was much much better than chocolate sauce. She was also moaning and writhing under him, waiting for him. When he was finished with his snack he moved onto the main course, plunging his tongue inside her. He swirled around in her, trying to find another morsel of strawberry, to lick her clean. She clutched his head with the same ferocity she had demonstrated when he'd been at her breast before. She was trembling quite hard and her feet were curled up into little balls in the blanket. He slid his tongue out of her and ran over the outer lips of her vulva. She whimpered in that helpless way that told him she was very close to orgasm and he pressed his tongue, flat and hard, against her clit. A few small circular motions were all it took. He stayed with her as the spasms overtook her body and she cried out his name over and over. It was the best thing in the world, hearing her call to him when she came. She always did, every time. Even when it was her own hands doing the work. And it melted his heart and turned his dick to steel. He kept his head between her legs as she trembled against him, continuing to caress her with his tongue until she tugged on his hair, signaling that it was finally too much. He moved up to kiss her mouth and she surprised him with her frenzied response. Usually she was relatively calm after orgasm but tonight she was almost crazed. Her legs wrapped themselves tightly around his back and she bit and licked at his face and neck while humming almost constantly in the back of her throat. Before he knew what was happening her hands were between them, working on the buttons of his jeans. She grunted with frustration as she tried to pull them off so he helped her. Soon they and his boxers were lying in a pile with his shirt and her clothes. As soon as he felt his cock pressing against her hot, wet center he felt almost dizzy with want. And he was afraid. Afraid that he wanted her too much to really do this, that he would end up hurting her, moving too fast, too hard, that he would lose all control. He took a deep breath and tried to calm himself. He listened to the ocean for a moment. It was moving closer to them. The spray from the waves was hitting them almost constantly now. It almost felt like rain. In a few hours this place would be completely submerged. He decided to meditate on that for a moment, to concentrate on the gentle, calm movements of the waves, rolling in slowly, soothingly... "Mulder...God Mulder. Fuck me. Do it now!" The ocean disappeared and all he could feel or hear or see or smell was her soft, hungry body, arching under him, rubbing against him. Telling him to fuck her. Jesus Christ. He wondered if she would ever understand what that did to him. He reached over into his jeans pocket for the condom he'd been carrying around with him since that first night they had been together and sat back on his knees to put it on. God knows, getting an eighteen year old Scully pregnant was not high on his list of priorities. Once he was done he took himself in his hands and gently probed her entrance. She was certainly wet and ready for him but he knew it wasn't going to be as easy as all that. It was going to hurt her. A lot. And it made him terribly sad to think that. And nervous. He'd never had sex with a virgin and it was something he'd never really planned on. If he screwed it up he would never be able to forgive himself. He counted slowly to himself in his head and tried to concentrate on one single word. Slow. Do it slow. Very, very slow. He pushed a little bit and she opened to let him in. He looked at her face for a sign of discomfort. Her eyes were closed and her mouth was partially opened. She looked okay. Hell she looked amazing, but he tried not to think about that too much. Then he pressed a little further and her eyes shot open. She gasped and bit her lip. He was hurting her. God, he was hurting her. "Scully, are you okay? Should I stop? Does it hurt?" "No, no don't stop. It hurts a little but it's okay. It's supposed to hurt. Keep going Mulder." He was still for a moment to let her get used to the feel and then moved another inch or so inside. It was supposed to hurt. God, it was so unfair. She felt so fucking good to him. She was so tight, so wet, and she was Scully and it was all he could do to keep from ramming into her like a lunatic and ripping her open. He bit down on his lip to keep from doing just that. And to share in the pain a little bit. "Is that it Mulder? Is it all the way in?" God, Scully. How could he hurt her this way? He wasn't even halfway inside her. "Mulder?" "Um, yeah. Yeah it is." He could just pretend. It didn't have to be all the way in. He could do it like this. It would be fine. "Mulder, it's not is it? Just do it Mulder. Just like jumping in the pool. All the way." "Scully...I..." Suddenly her hands were on his backside, shoving him deep inside her before he had a chance to stop it. He groaned and shuddered despite himself at the feeling. He was in. All the way. And it felt so fucking good. So good. He could lose himself very easily. She grimaced and he could tell that she was trying not to cry out from the pain. He leaned down and touched her face lightly. "Th..that's it. It's all the way. Are...are you okay?" She nodded but he could tell she really wasn't. He moved so that his whole body was covering hers and took her cheeks in his hands, kissing her softly. He rested his elbows on either side of her head and was somewhat gratified when his bone grated against the hard surface of the rock underneath the blanket. Pain was good. He needed pain. He needed to share this with her as much as humanly possible. And he needed something to distract him from his urges. "You just tell me when it stops hurting Scully," he whispered. He would wait. He wouldn't move an inch until she was ready. xxxxx When it stops hurting. Scully wondered if that day would ever come. She felt like her insides were being torn apart. Why did she have to be a virgin? It was so unfair, so aggravating. She could see that he wanted to start moving, to really fuck her good. He was shaking from the effort of remaining still. And she wanted it too. In her head. Her stupid body seemed to have other plans though. He was being so sweet, so tender and caring. She appreciated it more than she could ever express but it was also starting to drive her a little buggy. It was really amazing lying here in his arms, feeling him inside her, but she knew she wasn't going to really enjoy this on a physical level. She was doing it for the way it made her feel in her heart. And part of her just wished he would take her in a way that he would really enjoy, a way that would at least give her the vicarious pleasure. "Mulder, it's okay, you can move. It's okay." He let out a breath she hadn't noticed him holding before and started to drag himself slowly out of her. She felt as though she could feel every vein on his throbbing erection scraping against her insides. She wondered how it could possibly hurt so much when his fingers didn't hurt her at all. But despite the pain, she was happy. Happy to see the gratified look on his face and hear his voice quavering on a moan. She could definitely get used to this. He pulled almost completely out of her and she was grateful for the temporary respite, until his smile turned to a frown, and his face took on a look of terror she had never seen. He was looking down between them. "Scully..." She looked down too and saw the problem. She was bleeding. It was on him. "Oh, Mulder...I...I'm sorry..." She didn't know what else to say. It was so embarrassing. He had to be utterly disgusted. "Scully...sorry? No Scully, it's...it's my fault. I hurt you. I...I broke you Scully." He was just sitting there on his knees, looking between them with an expression of shock and remorse, like he'd just stabbed someone accidentally. It was ridiculous. "Mulder, you didn't break me..." she almost laughed repeating the words. He was so silly sometimes. "It's supposed to bleed Mulder. It's normal." "I...I know but it, it seems like a lot. Are you sure you're okay? I mean, do, do you need to go to the hospital or something?" She bit down on her lip to keep from laughing out loud this time. The hospital? He was really over the edge here. It was sweet that he was so worried about her but it was so absurd. "Mulder you don't...people don't...it's a broken hymen Mulder. You don't go to the hospital for that." She started giggling uncontrollably at the look of confusion and concern on his face. How could someone be so simultaneously brilliant and naive? When she started laughing though, he smiled. "Are you laughing at me Scully? Is that what you're doing? Cause it sounds a lot like you're laughing at me." She continued to laugh and he joined her. They sat there partially joined, giggling for a long time. It was beautiful to see him laugh. He didn't do it very often and it was a wonderfully soothing thing. It relaxed her. And it made her forget the pain. It made everything feel good. Maybe she could enjoy this after all. After they had calmed down a bit she smiled at him encouragingly. "So, does the blood bother you Mulder? Do you wanna stop?" He looked startled and shook his head. "Only if you do Scully. It only bothers me because I don't wanna hurt you." She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him down for a kiss. He moved back over her body and pushed gently and slowly inside her again. It didn't hurt as much as the first time. It still wasn't great but it was better. "Keep going Mulder, it feels good." And it did. As he gently started moving inside her, holding her face in his hands and grinning at her, she felt better than she ever had in her life. The sheer joy of seeing him like this, sharing in his happiness, was enough to make the pain irrelevant. After several moments of his slow, sensual and rhythmic thrusting inside her she started to feel like she might even be able to get some physical gratification. Not an orgasm certainly but it was starting to feel pretty nice. She noticed that he was starting to quiver against her and that he was panting heavily into her mouth as he kissed her. His movements sped up a little bit and he pulled back from her. He flattened his palms against the ground and rose up on his arms and she watched as his face contorted into a grimace of pleasure. "So good Scully...you feel sooo gooood..." His eyes slipped shut and he reached down, pulling her legs up so that they rested on his shoulders. It let him deeper inside and surprisingly it made the pain almost disappear entirely. She was wide open. He looked down at her questioningly. "Okay? S'okay?" he asked as he started pumping into her harder, faster. "Mmmyeah. S'better." He nodded and closed his eyes again. He looked so radiant, so sexy, so damned happy. His body was covered with a mixture of sweat and sea water, every muscle tensed in effort, his face a vision of rapture. He started moving even faster and every time he pounded into her, her body shook. His almost constant moaning was now interspersed with an occasional little "yeah" which for some reason, made her incredibly hot. He seemed very close. She hoped he wasn't waiting for her. She hoped he knew and understood that it just wasn't going to happen for her this time. His pumping grew less rhythmic, more frantic and frenzied and she moaned encouragingly. Then suddenly he stopped. He looked down at her almost pleadingly. "Scully? I..." "It's okay Mulder. It's okay. I want you to come for me. Come for me, please." "I don't...I...." She grabbed his ass and moved underneath him and he cried out and bit his lip. "Give it to me Mulder. Let it go." Finally he let himself go completely, driving into her with an almost superhuman force, over and over, lost to her, lost in her. He was hers. His eyes flew open and he captured her with his last conscious thought, his last coherent words. "Love you Scully. Love you. Love you. Love you." She felt him expand inside her and then as he made a sound that reminded Scully of a wolf howling at the moon, she felt him explode, filling her womb with a heat she had never known. xxxxx Water. Lots of water. Mulder was very wet. And it wasn't just Scully wetness. He had no idea how long he'd been lying on top of her body in a semi conscious state but at some point the tide had rolled in completely. They were lying in a rapidly growing pool of water. The blanket was soaked and he saw the carton of strawberries floating out to sea. They would be joining them soon if they didn't move. And their clothes. Shit! His car keys. He moved off of her reluctantly and grabbed his jeans before they were swept away. Scully sat up and chuckled at him as he gathered their things frantically. Very amusing. Leave it to him to pick a romantic hideaway that turned into a deathtrap. He tossed her her clothes and she pulled them on hurriedly. He put on his jeans and grabbed his shirt and her hand, leading her quickly off the rock and back to safe, dry land. They found a bench that was far away from the water and sat down to watch the rocks be consumed by the ocean. Well Scully watched that. Mulder couldn't take his eyes off her. He didn't really know what to say to her to make this better. She couldn't have possibly enjoyed that but he almost felt too awkward to even apologize. They sat in silence for several minutes and he became more and more convinced that she was trying to think of a delicate way to tell him that it had been the worst experience of her life. Why had he even tried? He'd known he wouldn't be able to control himself. She turned to him suddenly and smiled. "Mulder, that was wonderful. Thank you." "Thank..." he choked and shook his head. She had to be kidding. Or being polite. "Scully, you didn't even come. It lasted about five minutes! I was horrible Scully. I just...I wanted it so bad. I couldn't..." he couldn't keep talking because his throat constricted. He felt tears welling in his eyes and had to look away from her. "Mulder..." she stroked his hair and tried to turn his face towards hers. "Mulder look at me." He turned to her and looked at her knees. She put her hand under his chin and forced him to meet her eyes. "Mulder, stop. It was perfect. Nobody comes the first time. No women anyway. I wanted you to give yourself to me, completely, to let yourself go. And you did that. It was just what I wanted Mulder." The tears started flowing freely down his face and he bit back a sob. She still loved him. She didn't think he was a pathetic excuse for a man. She still wanted him. He slung his arm around her shoulders and pulled her to him, squeezing her tight. "I...I'll do better next time Scully. I promise. I'll make it good for you." She sighed heavily and shook her head against his chest. "Do you have a listening impairment Mulder? It was great for me. I loved it." "I know but..." "No buts Mulder. I loved it this time. I'll love it the next time. And every time. Because I love you. I'll love you forever." end part 9 Eleventh Hour (10/11) September 3, 1982 Scully looked down at her plate with a heavy, nauseous feeling. It had been nearly half an hour since the waitress had set it down and she'd only managed to stomach a forkful. Mulder seemed to be faring equally poorly. They sat in the fancy restaurant in downtown Annapolis without speaking, without eating. The only movement seemed to be Mulder's incessant fingers drumming on the table cloth. He was nervous. She could tell this much. She was something that went beyond nervous, to a place of fear and dread that she had never inhabited. Almost an entire month had gone by since she had given her body to him on that beach in Delaware. An entire month spent together laughing, making love, talking. Talking, but never about this. Never about tonight, or tomorrow, or what happened after that. They were putting it off, both of them. She realized that. Pretending that it wasn't going to happen, that it didn't have to happen. And deep inside, she still harbored a hope that it wouldn't. But one look at his dismal face across the table told her otherwise. He had bad news to tell her tonight. Perhaps worse that she had feared. The waitress drifted by and looked vaguely surprised when he gestured for the check. She dropped it on the table without a word though. Obviously the dire mood between them was apparent even to a complete stranger. He dropped a pile of bills on the table and reached for her hand. Without a word he led her out into the night. They walked hand in hand, still silent, down the boardwalk for several minutes. Scully felt strangely put off by the bustle of evening activity, by the calm of the water and the pretty lights from the buildings. This was a place that usually made her happy, a place she knew was going to be ruined for her very soon. It seemed so wrong that it was the same as always, that people here were carrying on as if it were just another night, another hour. She felt like the world was about to end and she was the only person who realized it. When he stopped walking and leaned against the railing, letting go of her hand, turning to her somewhat reluctantly, she thought for sure that she heard the sky falling. "Scully..." It was all he said for a long time. She stood beside him, looking out at the water. She heard a little baby crying and it comforted her in a small way. She wasn't alone at least. When he started talking again, it was a torrent of words, some that she heard, some that just echoed in her brain without ever settling into a logical pattern. "I have to go..." was how he started. The rest scarcely mattered to her. She listened to his careful, well thought out arguments. She was too young to have this kind of relationship, he would only end up hurting her by staying around, he would suffocate her, make it impossible for her to grow or to learn, he had no idea how much he had screwed things up by coming back here in the first place and he didn't want to tempt fate any further, something was telling him it was time to go. As he spoke she continued to stare at the water, nodding a few times when his words rang true, clutching the rail with whitening knuckles. She felt the tears building inside her and she bit her lip to hold them back. She couldn't, wouldn't look at him. It would only make it worse. "Scully..." He reached for her face and she jerked away reflexively. If he touched her she was sure she would crumble into a million pieces. "We'll see each other again Scully. I have to believe that. It's the only hope I have in this life." His voice cracked as he spoke and she finally looked at his face. His eyes were full of water and pain and horror. And she understood. This wasn't his choice. Not really. He was doing what he thought was right for her, for the future, for them. She couldn't be angry with him for this and that made the whole situation even more painful. "Do you understand Scully? Do you believe?" She wasn't sure how to answer that. Yes she understood. She understood why he was making the choice but she didn't understand the cruelty of fate that forced him to make it. Yes she believed that they were destined for each other but destiny had let her die once before, what would it do to them now? Yes she believed that he loved her, that he would wait for her for eternity but could she believe that their time would ever come? She nodded as she felt a cold, bitter tear fall down her face. She wasn't about to beg. He reached between them again and stroked her cheek with his thumb, catching the moisture. "Forever Scully. I swear to God." He leaned down to kiss her and she kissed him back with everything she had in her, everything she possessed to show him what he was to her, to show him that she too would wait, would love, forever. They kissed with a desperation and neediness that frightened her. It felt like falling into a black hole. She clutched at his jacket for support, feeling as though her legs might simply give out from under her at any moment. The salt of their tears and saliva mixed on her face and she tried to memorize the taste. When he pulled back it was like ripping duct tape off her body. His eyes were still closed and he backed away from her. "Go Scully." "I ca..." "Go now. Please." He still wouldn't open his eyes. He turned his back to her completely, unable to watch her walk away from him. She stumbled backwards a few steps, unable to stop watching his shaking form. When she was several feet away from him she remembered something important and ran back. She grabbed his shoulder. "Mulder..." "Scully PLEASE!" he cried, unwilling to turn around. She pulled the tiny piece of gold from her neck and placed it in his open palm from behind him. She closed her fingers around his hand and kissed the back of his neck. "Keep this safe for me," she whispered before turning and walking the road back to her apartment alone. xxxxx "Mulder, are you all right?" The frantic shout was almost as loud as the pounding on the bathroom door. Mulder muttered something noncommittal to make Mark go away and heaved over the toilet again. He couldn't remember ever in his life feeling as foul, as dirty. This was wrong. It was all hideously and deeply wrong. Twisted. Who the hell had he thought he was coming back here? He hadn't saved her, he'd only hurt her sooner. He didn't think he would ever be able to forget her tears tonight. He'd been sobbing himself uncontrollably since she'd handed him her cross and walked away from him on that pier. Sobbing so hard that when he'd finally managed to drive himself home he'd ended up vomiting up every ounce of food in his stomach. He didn't know what he was doing anymore. He didn't know what in God's name he was supposed to be doing. He thought this was the right decision but how was he supposed to know? How was he supposed to be sure when it made him feel like dying and hurt her so badly? He couldn't live without her. How was he supposed to live without her? "How?" he asked in the empty room. "HOW?" He stood up and held the sink for support, looking at himself in the dingy mirror. There was bile dripping from his chin. There was the same darkness in his eyes that he'd seen after she'd died. "How, you stupid son of a bitch? How?" And he knew the answer. There was no way. He couldn't do this. It was impossible. He didn't care if he was screwing with fate, playing God, whatever. He didn't care if every bone in his body was telling him to go, go now before he screwed things up. He didn't care if it was bad for both of them in the long run, he needed to be with her now, while he still had the chance. He looked again at his deranged visage in the mirror. No. He couldn't do that to her, he couldn't stay. But he couldn't go. He brought both his fists to the mirror and slammed into it, harder than he had intended. Shards of broken, reflective glass, stuck to his hands, crashed to the floor. He sank to the floor with them, to his knees. Blood from his hands covered his face as he weeped into them. He felt another heave building in him but he knew there was nothing left inside. He was empty. "What the hell am I supposed to DO?" he moaned to himself. He reached into his pocket and took out the memento that she had given him. Her cross. He thought back to other times, to the significance of that small piece of jewelry, to how much it meant to her and what it meant for her to give it to him. His faith had screwed them up. It had screwed them up royally. Maybe it was time to give what she believed in a fighting chance. He held the chain in his fingers, dangling the cross in front of his face and looked upwards. At least he was in the right position. "Um...I've never exactly done this. I mean I don't really know..." He broke off into another choking sob. He felt ridiculous but maybe, just maybe. It was his last hope. "I just...I need her. I mean I really, really need her. And she..." he swallowed a gasp and tears stung the back of his throat. "She believes in you so I just thought maybe you could help us. I need to know...I need to be sure...I have to know that I'm doing the right thing here because if I can't be sure then I don't think I can do it. I need...I need a sign. Anything. I just need to know that this is the right decision. Please..." He burst into pathetic, wrenching tears, realizing how far he'd sunk. Praying to a God he didn't really think existed like some eleventh hour convert in an exploding mine, sitting on the floor of a dirty bathroom with blood and vomit covered hands and knees. But he asked again. "Please...please...please." And again and again. And he cried himself to sleep on the floor of that bathroom like a wounded child. end part 10 Eleventh Hour (11/11) Mulder woke with a stiff feeling in his joints. A feeling he wasn't used to anymore. He was hot and uncomfortable. Sticky. The bathroom. That's where he'd fallen asleep. No wonder he was feeling so disgusting. Nothing like sleeping in your own vomit and blood on a concrete floor covered in glass to give you a rejuvenated feeling in the morning. He wondered sickly what time it was, if he had missed his flight. Maybe he had. If he had, well maybe he could take that as the sign he'd been asking for. He opened his eyes slowly. Everything was fuzzy and bright. And yellow. Like sunrise. He wasn't on the floor. He wasn't in the bathroom. He jerked up, startled, and next to him, a woman sighed. He wasn't in the bathroom and he wasn't alone. "Mmm...Mulder, go back to sleep." He knew that voice. He would have known it anywhere. He turned to her and shook her naked back. Naked. She was naked. So was he. Little things started dawning on him slowly. This place they were, it wasn't her apartment, it wasn't his either. This bed they were in, it didn't seem familiar. He wondered if maybe he'd gotten wasted last night and dragged her to a motel. "Scully. Scully wake up!" She made an irritated grunting sound and turned to face him. She turned and she...she was Scully. She was really, really Scully. The Scully he had known. The Scully who had died. She looked exactly the same as she had the last day he had seen her, the day they had had that terrible fight. "Mulder what is it? It's too early." He noticed a mirror hanging opposite the bed. Their bed? He looked at their reflection. He was him. Forty years old again. And she was her. Naked. In their bed. "Scully what day is it?" She rolled her eyes and turned over again. "Go to sleep Mulder." "What year is it? Scully? What year?" "Mulder shuddup and lemme sleep. We've gotta go to work in a couple hours." Work. Where did they work? What state were they in? What planet?? For a minute he was sure it had to be a dream or hallucination. Then the next minute he figured everything else that had come before had been a dream. But maybe none of it was a dream. Maybe it was all real. "Scully, I'm serious. I need to know. What..." She sat up and turned to face him fully and the blanket fell, revealing her soft, beautiful body underneath. He couldn't finish the question. "Mulder, I'm serious too. Stop being silly and let me..." She drifted off and stared blankly down at his hand. He followed her gaze. The cross. It was the fucking cross, shining golden in the sunlight. "Mulder where...where did you find that?" She reached over and took it from him, turning it over and over in her hands. "I um...I don't..." "Mulder I can't believe you found that! I've been looking every...for years...I...." Tears started to flow down her face but this time she was smiling. This time they were tears of happiness. Suddenly she threw her arms around him, startling him. For a moment he didn't respond because he was so gripped with confusion and uncertainty. He still didn't know where they were, or what their lives were like, he didn't know what had happened in the past, what he had chosen, how he had gotten here. But as he felt her arms tighten around him, as her lips began tracing sweet kisses down his neck and arms, as she whispered "I love you so much", he realized none of that mattered much. He must have done something right because somehow, some way, he had ended up here. END! :) More ramblings from the author: Okay, that was the first idea for a fanfic that I ever had. I posted it a looong time ago as a challenge and nobody answered it as far as I know so I decided to take it on myself. It's my first attempt at a pre-Xfiles story and I'm a teensy bit uncertain about it. Any feedback, good, bad or ugly, would be greatly appreciated! Thanks for reading folks.